A lurker no more! I have a question about exit counseling for ex-JWs

by True North 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sunnygal41

    Purple! (I absolutely love that color, btw)

    Basically counselling does not give you the answers but helps an individual explore the answers that they already have in their possesion but just don't realise it. Its an independent, non-judgemental ear for the person to bounce their thoughts, ideas and explore their own answers.

    That is about the best description I have ever heard regarding counseling..........for many years, I went, expecting to be told this is what you do, this is what you do not do.........and it really is all about learning that each of us is an individual and our answers are very personal and individual to each of us, and that is absolutely okay! I think the reason that we go in expecting to be told what to do and how to do it, is because that is how we've all been taught, from the moment we come out of our mom's womb.........it's no, don't touch this or that, or hold the spoon this way..........then when we head to school, we receive mass indoctrination into how to think, how to feel............that's why, even tho I work for the Board of Education, I think it's time that we stopped teaching our kids by rote, and started letting them express themselves creatively and use their own thinking abilities..........what do you think?


  • Rabbit


    Welcome again, I too just watched and read for a while, still very scared just being here. After 6 years 'inactive' and 3 years not going to meetings -- I lurked on & off, then on for about a month, then started posting the first of January. I've talked (a little at first ) to my non-witness wife about stuff I've read, because of my situation with the JW's right now, then to another non JW friend, a little. I was still scared, to SPEAK OUT LOUD about such things, my true feelings.

    My point is, since being on this site, I've made a lot of progress...from not saying anything 'critical' of the WTS...to now having over 70 posts in a month! I'm not quite the 'sage' yet, but am learning. Just two days ago...I launched into a 2 hour stream of complaints about what the WTS does to people and their families, and the reciting of many experiences I've read about, etc. I went on and on...to my surprised friend. I have NEVER had such a clear view of what is going on in my life, because of the WTS! When I finished (out of breath) my friend said, "Well, OK", "you have some strong feelings there." I fely like a great weight was lifted off of me...I can breathe again.

    That is when I knew...I would never be back to a Kingdom Hall.

    Welcome, I hope things go well for you. I went thru individual counseling, because of Depression. However, my Doctor did help me with some of the unreasoning 'guilt' I had as a Witness, she had other Witness patients. Maybe that will work for you, too.

  • garybuss

    What the post exit counseling did for me was show me how the high control groups get and keep their high control. The counseling outlined the tactics and then showed how the tactics worked. The counseling dismantled the system and showed me how the group was using my superstitions and my fears and my assumptions to manipulate me.

    In the end it showed me that my core beliefs were flawed and helped me to identify those beliefs so I could challenge them in a rational way. It's not a very good project for a person who wants to protect a delusion. Those delusions were a major part of the problem. Most if not all of us who went deep into challenging our sacred core beliefs that were based on superstition and assumptions came away as skeptics and agnostics and are glad we did.

    I can tell you this. When I emerged from challenging my core beliefs, I no longer believed that the story of the naked lady and the talking snake and the global flood was objective history. And I doubt that some Widget maker or book publisher will ever convince me they have ghosts as directors again.

  • DevonMcBride

    Hi True North and welcome


  • Carmel


    I and my wife have had a lot of contact with persons that were dealing with religious guilt, not necessarily what most would call cults, but very opressive "Christian" pastors. Without recommending anything specific, I'd call your local mental health agency and see if they have any community outreach for those dealing with life stresses. If I were nearby, I'd be happy to assist.


  • acsot

    Check your PM.

  • Frannie Banannie
    Frannie Banannie

    Welcome to JWD, TrueNorth! A post that will help yall recognize any psych issues is....http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/16/57203/1.ashx

    Glad to have you here, TN....wishing yall a happy future....enjoy the posters on JWD...jgnat's post is a great intro to the forum here...


    Frannie B

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