Avoiding Temptation As a Young Elder

by TMS 26 Replies latest jw experiences

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    @TMS do you regret not slipping her one ?

  • TMS
    TMS

    No. The guilt would have been overwhelming. I had a loyal, loving wife for 49.5 years. We left JW together. Since her death I've remarried to a fantastic filipina 33 years my junior and life is very good. When I originally left JW I told myself that I was now free to become an adulterer, thief, criminal or anything I wanted, but I realized that my values were actually mine, not some phony religious belief system.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    @TMS

    I've remarried to a fantastic filipina 33 years my junior and life is very good.

    My filipina wife is 23 years younger than me. We first met in 2011..married 6 years ago.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    @TMS--i realise from your opening post--we are the same age.

  • Hellothere
    Hellothere

    It's Very common women want married men. Either they think His good cause his married or they think they wanna compete with his wife, they just hate seeing another women happier. Knew a guy that never manage to pick Up girls visiting clubs. So he tested with putting marriage ring on. He hade no problems getting attention then by the females.

  • TMS
    TMS

    @stan,

    I met my wife in Cagayan de Oro in 2018. We've been married three years. She's an absolutely wonderful wife, household manager and companion.

  • Vanderhoven7
    Vanderhoven7

    @TMS

    You are a blessed man.

    I wouldn't want to imagine your life now if you had slipped up at 24.

  • JeffT
    JeffT

    I had been in contact with a witness friend through my senior year in college. By late summer, 1973, I was well on my way to getting baptized (which happened in November). There was a young sister from another nearby congregation, I think she dropped out of school to pioneer. So she was about 16 or 17, I was 23. She decided I was the one for her and started finding all kinds of reasons to be around me. She told at least two other sisters that I was "the one."

    She had a car, I didn't (what was I going to buy one with? I was working in a gas station owned by a brother as nobody wanted to hire a guy with a degree in English). So on a Friday afternoon she stopped by the station and asked me if I wanted to go to a drive in movie that night? Frankly, that kind of aggression scared the shit out of me, and would have done so even if I wasn't in the process of becoming a JW.

    I said no, rather emphatically and managed to get her away from the station. I made sure I didn't get anywhere near alone with her. A few months later she moved back to her original congregation and I didn't see her again for about a year. When I did see her she was disfellowshipped, unmarried and was carrying an infant around the circuit assembly.

    To this day I'm certain I dodged a bullet when I told her NO.

  • TMS
    TMS

    JeffT,

    So much is driving a young JW sister to lock in on a potential mate. In the JW world, a female's primary self-worth comes from snagging a husband, hopefully an elder. As a Regular Pioneer, she becomes only a suitable candidate for the role of elder's wife, the ultimate attainment for a JW female.

    So to the normal need for sex, companionship, family and/or children, a JW woman is unfulfilled until she finds an elder husband.

    My first wife and I pioneered with a JW sister who actually hated field service, never had or even wanted a Bible study, but married a young man who became a circuit overseer. Her life is fulfilled. She made it!

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    @TMS

    I met my wife in Cagayan de Oro in 2018. We've been married three years.

    my ( now ) wife has a house in a village in the Cagayan valley--nearest town is Aritao. But i first met her when she was here in the UK with a student visa--living near me. I havent visited the Philippines--no wish to. My wife got what she wanted--a new life in the UK. she has just applied for her British passport.

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