Question about visiting bethel ... akward moment at the end

by nevaagain 33 Replies latest jw friends

  • nevaagain

    Since there a couple of ex-bethelites here, and a lot of people from the greater NY area who have probably visited the Bethel in Brooklyn and Patterson many times, maybe they can shed some light into this curious question we (my wife and me) have for awhile.

    So a couple of years ago, we happaned to be in the states and also went to visit the Bethels in Brooklyn and Patterson. We had the full package, what I mean is, not only we took the tour, but we also had someone to invite us for lunch. While we wanted to enjoy our stay there, there was always a weird feeling being there. A lot of secrecy (the tour included only the boring places) and the lunch with all the rules about who sits where and who gets the food first was also very weird. And we definitely were happy when we were out...

    Anyway like I mentioned before. In both places, Brooklyn and Patterson we had someone who invited us for lunch, so at the end when they took us outside, there was an akward moment of silence, after we all hugged and said bye. Like the other party was waiting for something. Maybe an envelope of cash, or some other present? We only thought about it, because it happened on both occasions.

    So is this maybe a custom, that you give the bethelite something in return, after you got invited by him for lunch?

    Anyway we are already planing another visit to NY, but bethel will not be part of our visit.
    (Fun fact, the sister/friend who invited us last time to stay at her home, signaled that she stopped associating with jws)

  • stillin

    That IS awkward! Of course, on most other guided tours the guide can expect at least some of the people to tip him, and many do. That's fine, especially if it was a good tour with lots of info shared by an enthusiastic guide.

    not a guide like the one you had, who incidentally, has taken a vow of poverty.

  • konceptual99

    Just say thanks for the tour and tell them you've put a suitable donation into the WWW.

    My suitable donation? Jack.

  • ToesUp
    Anyone associated with Beth Hell expects something. Have you ever had a CO, pioneer or Bethelite pick up the tab for anything? They are broke. They are living off of the backs of others, the ones they insult for having a good job and an education. They will insult you but they LOOOVVEE your money!
  • WingCommander

    Maybe they were waiting for you to offer them a ride out of that forced labour camp? To take them away from their anguish? Save them, as it were?

    Surely they weren't expecting money, for the love of money is the root of all evil. And besides, seeing as how they are at the "Lord's House", I'm certain that "Jehovah provides." I would have told them to go back to work, be warm and well fed. lol.

  • sir82

    They probably were expecting money.

    Bethelites tend to expect money pretty much any time they do something "nice" for someone.

    Maybe that's one of the lessons in in "new boy school" - "how to shake down friends & acquaintances".

  • 08out
    I went there about 20. years ago and was told from a former bethelite that was with us they do expect money at the end ,don't remember if I did but I probably gave some
  • fulano

    They expected a nice tip, believe me. And why not? We lived like beggars.

    I remember the italian/american family visiting our missionary-home, with three kids, sent by the bloody branch on a saturday afternoon. Canceling all bible-studies. They were " checking where to serve the need was greater". My ass. First needed to loose fifty pounds a piece to walk whole day in the tropical Sun.

    Anyway we made pizza and a bunch of pasta for the whole 1000 pounds group, they didn't even help with the dishes.

  • DesirousOfChange

    They are taught to "glean" off of the "surplus" of the flock.


  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim

    Just stay inside of ''marked areas'' and follow the herd

    I've had an eerily similar situation when visiting a bethel. We arrived with our group about 6-10. Joined up with another similar-sized group. Went through the ''non-secretive'' areas even had lunch with a very, very, very impeccable who got food first and who sat where!!!!

    Needless to say, our first group was the first to end the group(sent home). The other group just kind of stood around, with the tour ''coordinator''. She excused us. There was a pause. A few seconds. She excused us again with a slight tone of annoyance in her voice ''you can go, you guys''. We started walking, hestitantly looking back with the other group looking smugly at us. You could sense a slight tone of being annoyed with the ''tour coordinator''. Weird, huh???

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