Living a Lie (page 2)

TheLiberator

Appreciate Jolted Awake comments. If someone chooses the path of atheism, it must be a personal decision. A person cannot be coerced through preaching it. But if one is a true believer, the best thing that you can do is show that the hope remains the same, but who you put your trust in changes.

I agree with the scriptural proof Jolten Awake uses. I know this is wise advise, simply because I would of been that type of person if my wife discovered TTATT first. But my life has been VERY smooth, because I went from being a JW to being a relaxed Christian that maintains many of the core doctrines of the Watchtower. Namely, God's purpose for the earth, what the kingdom is, God is not a trinity, God's name is Yahweh.

Some may think I am preaching when I share these websites. However, this is not the case. I share these, because many feel like I do, in that the Watchtower has some truth. That is what they use as a lure. Then the propaganda begins. Many have "no place to go".

But by discovering that others believe similarly, but with no high control, a person does not feel so alone. It is due to discovering these, that has brought great peace to my house. It comforts my wife to know that my beliefs are similar and I haven't gone off the deep end.

So my advise, is to do a little research. If you hold no religious beliefs, it may be difficult. But your husband needs to know that truth still exists, but not in the Watchtower. A person does not need atheism or agnosticism. What they need are choices. Unfortunately, this site does not always clearly show those options. This does not help those who are "jolted awake" like I was. This is one of many choices. I hope things work out for you.

http://www.scatteredbrethren.org

http://www.focusonthekingdom.org

Heartsafire

I'm going through a similar problem with my husband. He is clinging to paradise hope with all he has despite the fact that he does not believe other important JW doctrines such as 1914, etc. What I am trying out, and it might help you, is to find a professional therapist to talk to. We cannot control what our husbands believe, or how they behave, or even help them overcome their deep-seated issues. But, we can help ourselves to overcome the emotional turmoil induced by years in a high control group. The sooner you are healthy and happy, the sooner he will take notice and want that for himself as well. Not saying you aren't healthy and happy, but when we feel forced to live a lie or risk losing our entire family and friends, we are not exactly in a healthy situation.

Rather Be the Hammer

My husband did react so extremely years ago. But I thought: whenever he starts to threathen to kill himself I will say: 'When you're going to kill yourself you're not going to paradise anyway. And killing yourself will make you as bad as I am ... then better let's have fun together if we're both not going to make it to paradise!!'

crazy_flickering_light

First the soundtrack, your title named like a song: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7y84_guano-apes-living-in-a-lie_music

Maybe you can help him, to change his view from bOrg to christian?

thereishope

Ding - thanks so much! You were the first to get back to me and you brought tears to my eyes - sometimes all it takes is to know someone is listening and hearing and caring, and you were that person. I was then able to get some sleep.

Mark of Cain - yours was the first reply I read this morning. Thanks for caring!

Jolted Awake - lots to take in there. I'll definitely read it more carefully when I get a chance. Thank you!

Finkelstein - you hit the nail right on the head! Hubby pretty well stopped maturing emotionally and intellectually when he was about 12, when he started drinking. He has been sober for 25 plus years. Sucks to be him! negotiating an adult world with those handicaps. I feel for him, and I feel for me also.

What Happened - I'm trying to figure out your Snow White reference. Something about sleeping for a long time perhaps. Or being awoken with a kiss. Wish all it would take is a kiss for my husband to wake up :) And you are right, as uncomfortable as this is, practicing patience and letting things cool down is a good idea.

JRK and Gary Neal - glad I have a couple of fans Thanks for making me laugh! How can I change my user name to apostate witch. I wish I could show that Bugsy cartoon to my husband. He can have his delusions - its when I have to pretend that I still share them that makes this feel impossible right now. And now the jigs up (do you have a cartoon for that - sounds like an opening line) I'll have to convince him I'm not pretending! Pretend I'm not pretending - wrap my head around that one. But that's for another post. Lie about lying, or not lying, or something. My head is spinning.

Anders Andersen - thank you for your good luck wishes - I'll need all the luck I can get - good thing now that I've learned TTATT I can believe in luck again. :) I will give your words careful consideration when I have the time - thanks again.

Ding

Thereishope,

Thanks for your kind words.

If at any point it would help you to talk, feel free to PM me.

sparrowdown

Apostate bitchcraft the art of pissing people off by telling them the truth about the truth.

Finkelstein

Maybe it might be better to show that the JWS has been an organization of lying corrupt charlatans, running their own publishing house, deceiving people with their unscriptural teachings and false bible interpretations.

That factual information is getting pretty obvious now and is easily obtainable off the inter-net.

There's no way he's going to be saved associating or supporting these false prophets according to the bible.

rebel8

People threatening suicide is not a religious issue. It's a medical one. He needs help regardless of any temporary truce you've made.

With his licensed therapist, perhaps he could discuss the effect his horrible religious beliefs contributed to him wanting to die.

freemindfade

It sucks. Every couple where one wakes up is different. Don't be hopeless. When they first catch wind of it their head explodes. Some recover and some even eventually wake up. Just make sure you vent and communicate with others like you to maintain your own sanity through this.

Fmf

Living a Lie

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