by Drifting Away 36 Replies latest jw friends
From what I hear in my licality, and from wat I read on various OP's, it is the aberant behaviour from BoE's which is causative of individuals wanting to fade.
The content of conventions, elder schools etc, merely embolden them to harshess and thus the fading continues. Their disposition cannot be rescued that I can discern.
i did not realize at the time I was df what was going on only when I got a copy of the flock book from memory one instruction was don't have a judicial meeting unless your convinced the bro is guilty or words to that effect and that was my experience what they wanted was for me to accept their judgement and not defend my actions another section said not to attempt reproof Elder Les Holden did, got egg on his face with my reply I was then quickly sent out the room 5 minutes later called back in to be told I was DF and my wife to be publicly reproved then this GLORIOUS bastard PRINCE counselled my wife not to have anything to do with me of a spiritual nature setting in motion for her the fear of not simply spiritual endangerment but absolute later when giving council to my 10 year old son he offered to help him with any future talks because as he told him he no longer had a father THANKS LES you did me a favour Cause this experience led me to the ttat after 30 years of remaining loyal despite all the red flags
Just now I have reason to be quiet and let things be. Were I to be pursued by a JC and DFd then the breaks would be off. I would never be "repentant" but would feel free to be active. So the BoE/Cong would meet with a significant "response cost"!
I wonder, N.K, if the Top Brass of JW Org are aware that to pursue "faders" and DA or DF them would be the most counter-productive move they could make ?
Many, like you and I, keep a low profile at present, but if poked with a stick this snake will strike ! and I am sure most others would too, no reason then not to go, not just Public on it all, but Viral !
The WT of course, doesn't publish the numbers of faded ones. Cong secretaries mark their publisher record cards as "inactive" however and the numbers could easily be collated. If I remember correctly, I think the CO forwards a tally of "inactive" ones to the branch as part of his report. It's not for nothing therefore that guilt tripping is increasing - "Loyalty.... Don't Give Up" etc.
So the numbers of those faded or in the process are likely "a large army" in all probability and the encroaching of the enemy upon their peace (via JCs) could move that army to action - yes indeed. I would find a JC quite counter productive for "the organisation".
No unless you walk away and openly do things they consider bad. You have to be careful and hide if you celebrate anything or go to other churches or talk negatively about org because then your spreading apostasy. They say your free to walk away but that's a lie. Because the moment you start living your life the way you want they disfellowship and take your friends and family away from you.... You don't have a choice
I've had several friends who simply moved away from their home congregation. When they left they told no one or indicated that they would send a forwarding address as soon as they were permanently set in at their new town or state.
Usually appearing to stay active right up until your move works best. If you've already broadcast your intention to leave by only attending meetings occasionally and not otherwise participating, everyone will figure that you are bailing and will then come after you.
The smoothest transition I ever saw was back in the mid-1980s when an elder and his family decided they wanted out. He had an opportunity to get a better job in a city some distance from his old home. As he and his family left their home congregation for the last time, they told everyone that they would send their address to one of the other elders and let everyone know how they were doing. When asked where they were moving, they replied along the lines of "northern Washington, but we don't have a permanent address yet." In those days no one had cell phones, so telephone numbers did not follow them. (You can do the same thing by changing carriers at the same time you move and only inform those who you trust with your new numbers.)
No one will give much thought about you for the first few months. But then when no request for your publisher's records arrives, the elders might think something is up - but most are lazy and will just let it ride for a while.
Do not contact anyone you left behind. If you do send a note, use email or send a card with no return address and maybe a message like, "We're still looking for a permanent place up here in northern Washington."
It worked for them. Just fade into the distance. They will forget all about you unless you leave relatives behind. Don't leave relatives behind...
JV
