Sex before marriage.

by nicolaou 22 Replies latest social relationships

  • nicolaou

    Mrs Nic' and I were 16 and 18 years old respectively when we first met at a Circuit Assembly in Corby. Three years later we were married. We've had a great time, we're very lucky but looking back I can see how crazy it is to put that pressure to marry on teenagers.

    The 'no sex before marriage' thing is hardly unique to JW's but I wonder why they just refuse to see the problems it brings. Treating marriage as a hoop to jump through or ticket to be purchased before having sex seems to me to be devaluing marriage not elevating it.

    And yes, we were virgins on our wedding night!

  • Finkelstein

    Totally agree , its a causative reason why so many JWS end up in divorce.

    People getting married when they were not mentally and emotionally prepared or married people who they were instigated to by virtue of marrying only other JWS.

    I would have to admit I was one of these people. (18 when married)

  • road to nowhere
    road to nowhere

    The not even holding hands mentality us the more damaging. Wife and I are from before the crazy restrictions. We were virgins, but had a pretty good idea about e everything short of. We have had a good sex life

    Part of the problem is being " forced" to marry an unattractive mate

  • Giordano

    Early Marriage....... we 'courted' and spent a lot of time together. We were virgins when we married but always gave one another a fair amount of petting. We kept our private business private. Always had a smile on our faces.

    Married for 56 years....still in love.

    I tell people who ask that she is the love of my life....she tells people that I am her current husband.

  • iwantoutnow


    We petted a number of times - then she got a horribly guilty conscience - the whole judicial thing was next - then years of and years of her guilt (cuz she had done stuff with another guy before) - sex life was horribly damaged - wound up f-ing up the marriage.

    I FUCKING HATE THE WT - the GB - and the piece of crap fairytale this is the bible.

  • Still Totally ADD
    Still Totally ADD

    The wt. lives in a fantasy world where all young people have no hormones and never think about sex. Even though they teach god created all things including sex they make it a dirty thing. Showing that God must have a dirty mind. For my wife and I we were virgins when we were married over 45 years ago. But don't think we were not thinking about it. We are made from the date we are born when we mature to reproduce. I know for a fact many elders especially those older ones think if a young couple does a little touchy feeley and is found out how dirty they are, why would they ever do anything like that and how could they ever hurt god. I just look at them and say I guess you were never young. Still Totally ADD

  • Finkelstein

    Not to say a very loose sexaul lifestyle is unproblematic , people who sleep around as the saying goes usually end up with other problems of their own doing.

    I think the sex restriction and invasive scrutiny into people's sexual behavior is over done in the JWS religion .

    Other Christian religions give guidance but are less judgmental and invasive.

  • Hairtrigger

    Yup! Definitely!

    As soon as the platonic- that is thinking she is a goddess- part of the relationship is over.

  • zeb

    Still Totaly ADD

    There was a sister who told us by way of conversation that her boys were not interested in girls.. My wife must have seen my eyebrows go up.

    Sisters take note at 19 a young man has little else on his mind. and her sons were good looking!

  • iwantoutnow
    Not to say a very loose sexaul lifestyle is unproblematic , people who sleep around as the saying goes usually end up with other problems of their own doing.

    That's kind of a sweeping statement and a big generalization.

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