I found a list my Wife is makingof subjects i have told her about the BORG.

by goingthruthemotions 30 Replies latest jw experiences

  • kairos
    kairos

    It's time to have a real serious talk with her.
    I've been there and it isn't easy.

    It's time to find out if she intends to stay is this marriage.

    Based on her answer, you'll know how to proceed.

    With a list like that, it appears you have told her everything there is to be told about TTATT. ( I did the same ) She heard everything and is processing it. What she is planning is what you need to get to the bottom of.

    Are you prepared to face DFing for apostasy and all that that entails?
    I was am am glad I made my stand. I wish I had done it earlier.

    -----

    My wife and I are still together and are doing fairly well.
    I've been out for three years and DF'd for one. We had our 2th wedding anniversary this year and I have made a serious effort to quit the anti-JW talk. It's very difficult to do, but it does make for a much more peaceful home environment.

    ---

    People talk about planting seeds.. We planted FARMS with our wives!
    See what grows, it may be nothing or she make awaken without notice.

    The more likely scenario is, 'she knows', but cannot face reality.
    Furious cognitive dissonance is too strong to overcome at the moment.

    Go easy and see what happens when you quit JW talk.

    ( Also, you should quit the meetings ASAP )

  • DJS
    DJS

    Some great advice. I'm with faded and hoser on this. She's developing a hit list and leverage.

    Be as innocent as a dove and as cautious as a serpent. Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst.

    And see a lawyer that specializes in divorce tomorrow.

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    You could go to the elders, get her in a JC (you have her tablet which is proof of her doubts) and see how the truth of Jehovah's spirit works on those elders.

    That is my evil thought. She wrote those things down. If there is no mention of you, then they are presumably, her thoughts.

  • steve2
    steve2

    That is my evil thought. She wrote those things down. If there is no mention of you, then they are presumably, her thoughts.

    Unless of course she noted down those topics on the advice of the elders.

  • TheListener
    TheListener

    Maybe it's a list of things that she wants to ask the elders about. Not necessarily to out you but to put to rest any doubts you may have created. She might not be planning to turn you in.

    I agree with others though that you need to stop talking about the jw stuff with her.

  • cha ching
    cha ching

    I liked the advice on JWfacts, you cannot go too fast. You have already given her many things to think about, give her time.

    Be nice to her, develop a different relationship, one built on interests other than JW things. Gardening? Music? Art? Go places, take classes together, become a different person... one she looks forward to seeing.

    As far as her "kicking you out of the house"... I don't think she can without something legal ordering you to. So, if you don't move out "just because she tells you to" you will still have a place to live. That will make it easier for you if you decide to make adjustments.

    Personally, I think the things she has written down are going to sink in... let her take her time in investigating...

    The nicer you are, the less she has to complain about, right?

    Good luck, let us know how it goes.....

  • never a jw
    never a jw

    If you fear trouble, then get rid of the evidence. Files get lost, tablets get stolen or damaged by spilled coffee, or people sit on them.

  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    if your wife is about to stab you in the back--you better destroy your no blood card or the wound could prove fatal.

  • smiddy
    smiddy

    I`m inclined to go with cha ching on this one , and hopefully we are right .As JW facts says , you could ask her at an appropiate time ,dont any of these questions give you cause for concern ?

    Give her the benefit of the doubt , and more time to absorb what you have said , maybe she will have doubts that you never knew about.

  • zeb
    zeb

    Please. have you gone to the counsellor yet. I fear you are binding yourself up into some serious knots. You cant do this on your own.

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