Gorbatchov, speaking snakes in Africa? You gotta elaborate man!
Crazy WT stories
the Japanese Yakuza boss who had his very own daughter killed because being a jw she wouldn't join the crime family, after deciding to leave the Yakuza he starts a study and is now an elder, yes I'm sure that really happened.
Check out this thread, there's quite a lot of crazy stuff here.
A girl took her smurf doll to the Kingdom Hall and it bit her during the meeting.
What about that one with the guy.... the linen salesman that decided to write a load of bible literature and start his own religion and then he tried to sell miracle wheat to his followers and then his wife left him then 100 years later a cult had developed all over the world but they are not allowed to read the founders writings because they are so batshit crazy.... like how the pyramids have secret codes such as the end of the world was the length of a corridor in a pyramid ...1914.... oh remember that one?
The one I heard my father repeatedly relate was this:
One old timer pioneer brother got into a heated debate at the door of a wealthy man's large home. The househoulder tried to shut the door. But the old pioneer put his foot in it for one final comment. He said, "One day in the new system, I'm gonna live in this big home".
Years later, at a convention the old pioneer brother felt a tap on his shoulder. When he turned around, he was met by the very same householder who said, "Hey brother..... if you still want that house your going to have to buy it now, I just got baptized" !
What a happifying day that proved to be, I'm sure.
That's a creepy thing to say, isn't it? He's threatening the guy!
He said: One day in the new system, I'm gonna live in this big house
Translation: Soon God will kill you at Armageddon and Ill take your empty home.
Yh I've heard the majority of these. The JEHOVAH on the shiney floor I remember my dad telling my that one when I was like 6.
Did you ever hear or read the one where a brother was in prison in WW2 and the guard used to use pages of the bible to roll his cigarettes and the brothers collected all the dog ends and would hold bible studies in the prison using the left over pages of the bible?
Pale Emperor - never heard that one.
But I did hear some stories about the Nazis and the exemplary way the imprisoned sisters used to clean their barracks. About how they were so clean, the nazis got a ladder to run a white glove over the beams and found them spotless...
Or the one about a bro riding his bike with a package of magazines being stopped by a nazis. When asked what was on his bike, the bro truthfully told him it was Awakes and Watchtowers. The nazis just scoffed at it like it was a joke. The bro got to deliver the mags. That example was used to show that we must tell the truth......
The JW who witnessed to a business man on a train, event tho he knew that he wouldn't listen. The man took the book and later thru it out the window. The book hit a man was who contemplating suicide.But when he read the title "The Truth That Leads to Eternal Life", he decided to study with the witnesses and became a JW.
Several years ago at a convention, the speaker was going on about the man who had said at a specific date, Armageddon was to happen. Harold Camping. The speaker chuckled at how ridiculous that man was. Ho Ho Ho. But the speaker continued on how some witnesses had also believed a certain date. Ha Ha Ha. Run up credit cards etc. Ha Ha Ha. How sad that some looked for a specific date. Hahahahaha That is one of the saddest and the most devious story I've heard from them.
These "stories" are totally whack! Hahahaha! What a bunch of gullible fools JW's are! Hahahaha!