Your Favorite Plays on Words

by compound complex 38 Replies latest social entertainment

  • compound complex
    compound complex

    Greetings, Fellow Word Lovers:

    Please add your favorite, clever smithing of words.

    ****************************

    Time flies like an arrow and fruit flies like a banana.

  • new boy
    new boy

    Can the old new light ever be new light ever again?

    Answer only at the [email protected] society.

  • tor1500
    tor1500

    Hi,

    Heard this years ago.... A dollar three eighty...makes one think...how much is that again ?

    Tor

  • LoveUniHateExams
    LoveUniHateExams

    Capt. Blackadder hatches a plan to get out of the trenches by becoming an artist. He's crap at painting but realises his talented Lieutenant, George, can paint for him. George wants Blackadder to pose naked.

    "Sir it's artistic licence - it's willingness of suspension of disbelief"

    "Well, I'm not having anyone staring in disbelief at MY willy suspension!"

  • LoveUniHateExams
    LoveUniHateExams

    Capt. Blackadder: "I'm beginning to see why the Suffragette Movement want the vote"

    Sqn. Ldr. Flashheart: "hey - any bird who wants to chain herself to MY railings and suffer-a-jet-movement gets MY vote!"

  • LoveUniHateExams
    LoveUniHateExams

    The Duke of Wellington: "The men had a whip-round and got you this [cigarillo case] ... well what I mean is: I had the men roundly whipped until they got you this ..."

  • jp1692
    jp1692

    When I was 16 my older sister and I were in Paris. After a few days we decided to head to the south of France.

    This conversation actually took place at the train station. I'll begin with the ticket seller's queries then follow with my responses.

    The ticket seller asked us in quick succession:

    • Are you American? Do you speak French? Good day. How many tickets and where are you going?

    To which I replied:

    Yes, sir!

    No, sir.

    And how do you do, sir?

    We'll take two. Yes, two to Toulouse, sir!

  • Vanderhoven7
    Vanderhoven7

    What is an Italian bigamist?

    It's a fog that stretches from one end of Italy to the other.

    Why are Quebecers satisfied with one egg in the morning?

    Because one egg is une euf

  • sir82
    sir82

    Never take rock for granite.

  • Bad_Wolf
    Bad_Wolf
    "So why don't you make like a tree, and get outta here!"

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