Sorry to hear that you left the "truth"

by eyeuse2badub 18 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • eyeuse2badub

    The other day I ran into a jw who just happened to be my very friend during my jw days (which were most of my life). So for about 60 years we were each other’s very best friend. We grew up together from about 8 years old and are the same age, now in our early 70’s. We were in the congregation. We went to school together. He was much smarter academically than me but I was a better athlete (and better looking) so we were mutually jealous of each other at times.

    We went to jw parties together; we got drunk together, we dated many of the same jw girls back in the day when dating was ‘allowed’. We surfed together, water skied together. We raced our motorcycles and our cars against each other. He was best man in my wedding and I was best man in his wedding. Our wives became good friends and his kids became friends with my kids. So you sort of get the picture.

    But, we haven’t been that close for the past 20 years since we don’t live near each other any longer. His wife is a lifelong pioneer (50+ years) and he joined her as a pioneer 6 years ago. I, on the other hand, have been an inactive jw for about 6 years and was pimo for about 5 or 6 year before that. My wife is still active but not a super jw.

    Back to our chance meeting. We chatted for a while, then he hit me with: “I was really sad to hear that you have left the “truth.” I thought about it for a moment and then replied; “I didn’t leave the “truth”---the truth left the “truth”. Were we not promised by God’s organization that we would not grow old in this system? Were we not promised that God’s righteous new system would be here within the 20th century?”

    He didn’t reply but instead changed the subject. He told me as we parted that we need to continue this discussion at a later date.

    “Cool!" I said but inside it hurt like a son-of -a-bitch!

    just saying!

  • JaniceA

    That sounds like a unsatisfying conversation! It's sad what happened to a lifelong friendship. I'm sorry.

  • littlerockguy

    I wouldn't have replied "cool" when he said, "we need to continue this dicussion at a later date". I probably would have replied, "why?" since he apparently didn't have a reply after you said what you said. He knows you are right and he knows he is perpetuating lie by staying in the so called "truth" for the sake of his social life and social networking.

  • days of future passed
    days of future passed

    As I read his question, I thought to myself how I would answer it. At least 20 or so different answers could pop up. Mostly about facts and issues about the WT and how they are wrong.

    I thought these things before I read your answer.

    I like your answer because it was simple. And it allowed him to make the "truth" of the answer in his own mind. All those little doubts and disturbing facts that he brushed aside for years, suddenly flashed in front of his eyes. And what is even better, he can't fault you for what you said. He won't be able to console himself with "he was a raving bitter apostate" and make it go away.

    I'll have to remember your answer for myself.

  • Crazyguy

    Nice rebuttal “the truth left the truth” I’ll try to remember to use that.

  • jp1692

    Agreed. The religion I joined on the ‘80s no longer exists. There is nothing to “leave.”

    The name is the same, but the current Governing Body members are all apostates. It is THEY that have left the religion.

  • LongHairGal


    I know it’s sad about the broken dreams and lost friends when we leave the JW religion. It takes one event or rude awakening just to get JWs to take notice. Leaving is another thing and needs to be planned.

    I think you answered your former friend correctly and it may leave him thinking. This doesn’t mean he’s going anywhere especially if he has friends and business connections there. I think many JWs stay for these reasons and it won’t matter what the JW religion morphs into.

    I had hardly any friends there so leaving was somewhat easier for me. I felt a little bad, as you did, but in time the feeling went away.

  • snapdragon4

    Sixty years is a long time to know someone, you really bonded together with interests other than a common religion, after your wife it would appear he is possibly the most significant person in your life, and he will have the utmost respect for you.

    There's much to be said for rekindling the bonds of friendship, there's very little, if any, downside from your perspective and rather than be sad you have left "the truth" he may have a secret admiration for you being your own man, whereas despite his intellect (and his doubts) he's suspended his critical thinking abilities, and he knows it!

    I'd go for the interview.


  • sparrowdown

    He brings up the subject and then changes it when you reply - typical JW move, avoid any discussion with honest answers.

    "...sorry to hear that you left the truth..."

    Reply: "Sorry to hear that you haven't."

  • Finkelstein

    Should have said .... " I wasn't in it when I was a JWS. that's why I left."

    As its known JWS have relationships with other people which are designated and controlled by the WTS.

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