DF’d or DA???

by DATA-DOG 40 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • stuckinarut2

    Remember, "The ONLY power they have over you, is that which you allow"


    I’ve been thinking about it, and I might just write a letter of disassociation. Here’s why:

    The elders of been calling my phone, my old phone, and leaving messages saying that they would like to meet. I have no intention of meeting with them whatsoever, so they would be forced to proceed with their kangaroo court in my absence, and we all know what that means.

    So even though there’s really no fundamental difference between being disfellowshipped and disassociating oneself, it seems as though the latter choice is like quitting and not being fired. Also, it might make it easier on an emotional level for my aging parents.

    It’s strange that even though I’m an evil apostate, I still managed to worry about other people, even at my own expense.


  • Finkelstein

    Or just state on the next phone call that your disassociating yourself from any involvement with the JWS for personal reasons and you wont be participating in anything relating to this religion from here on..

    You dont not have to go into detail.

    Be polite but be firm.

  • Freedom rocks
    Freedom rocks

    You're taking control if you disassociate. The elders don't like not having complete control. It means you have chosen to shun them instead of them you

  • Sail Away
    Sail Away

    Data-dog, it is kind of you to think of your aging parents. A few quick questions:

    Is it still true that the DFd are being "disciplined by Jehovah, and "He loves those he disciplines"? In this case, wouldn't it ease their minds if there was a chance you might respond to that "love"?

    Would they even know whether you DAd or were DF'd?


  • DesirousOfChange

    You're taking control if you disassociate. The elders don't like not having complete control. It means you have chosen to shun them instead of them you.

    In my personal experience, a letter of disassociation was a "gift". It saved the Eldubs (who were assigned to chase down the perp) at least a couple of wasted nights handling the "investigation" and "kangaroo court proceedings". Frankly, it made it much easier on them, as most Eldubs really do not want to be the "bad guys" having to do the nasty business for the WTS.

    Would they even know whether you DAd or were DF'd?

    Most might not, but then you're assuming that all of that stuff is really "confidential". (HAHAHAHAHA) At the minimum most of the Eldub's wives and friends will know what happened.

  • dubstepped

    @DoC - I didn't know you DA'd. I thought you faded. Cool.

    I think it depends on the elders. Most I knew kind of got off on their power, but I'm sure that some hated having to disfellowship people. DAing certainly gives one more power though than being DF'd and in the end it should be about you and what you want. So many here are worried about them. It kind of shows the power they have that people are so worried about how they are perceived by the dubs. Just take care of you.

    It's kind of the first time you get to take a stand for yourself, something you'll need as you begin a new life of living for you instead of the cult.

  • DesirousOfChange

    Hey DubStepped, We are in (so far) a successful fade. My personal experience about DAing has to do with letters that were received by the BOEs on which I served. Sorry to state it in a way that was confusing.

    I do also understand your sentiments that DAing is to "take a stand". I think some people feel the need to make that kind of statement when they discover that they have been duped and make the decision to leave, and if that's the case, then DAing is the right thing for them. The risky part is that there is no going back on it (other than years of groveling in the back row of the Kingdumb Hell). Before sending in that DA Letter, one needs to be certain they are ready for their family and close friends to "drop them like a hot potato".

  • dubstepped

    Oh, my bad, I can see how I took that one way and could have read it another. Makes sense.

    Yeah, if you DA you have to know what's up. There will be no association, thus the dis- in DA. I literally just found out by accident at the bank where my mom lives now because my deceased dad and I share a name. I didn't know where she lived anymore. I knew what was up when making my decision.

  • Daniel1555


    Whatever you do you'll be free of them.

    At the moment it certainly needs a lot of strength and courage.

    I wish you all the best.

    By the way already for many years I love your posts. You can write so funny things that made me laugh many times and also helped in my situation.

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