by minimus 22 Replies latest jw friends
I was one ....
I didn't used to really get on with the others. When I was younger and fairly new to it there were some really experienced and capable ones that I looked up to, but you could never call them friends. When I found my feet I had nothing else in common with the others. It was a working relationship , like you have in your job.
I'd rather spend time with the "lesser" ones.. youngsters, oldies and eccentric ones in the cong.
It's been so long I wouldn't know one if I saw one. So, things are great between me and them.
For me not really, I played the part in service and talks but as I got older they could see I wasn't fulling accepting the religion religiously.
I was taken to the back of the Hall once, told if I didn't get a hair cut I couldn't go out in service or give talks anymore.
I had a 1/2 inch of hair over my ears.
That was the start of my exit.
Born in but faded about at about 20 years old.
I never trusted the elders. It's because of the fear of that "back room"
Awww the old back room!
I had no idea about the back room. Wasn't until I was all but out and met up with a bro who was on his way out. He explained to me the horrible things that went on behind the scenes.
The elders were generally very, very nice to me. It was the doctrines I saw through first. Not the elders. Then I realised that the elders were comfortable going along with blasphemy. But even when I called them out on it, they still kept trying to get me to go along with it. As they threw me out, one of them shook my hand. Another told me I had down some wonderful research. Yet another listed the fond memories he had of me.
And now - are they nice to me? When they see me they look away or disappear down the aisle of a shop. But others, not elders are behaving differently. They smile, they wave, they speak.
My name is not mentioned much by the elders. I suspect when they are not grinding their teeth at the thought of me they feel shame.
There was a period in my life where I was young, with no car, and struggled for basic groceries. At that time, I expected them to be there for me. They weren't.
Eventually, as my situation got better, I got married, got a
family of my own and thinking back on what happened, I realized that the issue
at its base was not these man. It was the Watchtower. I’ve been in several
congregations and the story was always the same: Elders had families, full time
jobs and simply running the business congregation was the
equivalent of a second job. Then, top this off with the problems of parishioners
where a noticeable part of them suffer from depression and other mental
illness.
The expectations of the Watchtower are too high, they are unattainable. In the end, the problem at its core is that elders should be able to make a living and focus on their role.
the problem at its core is that elders should be able to make a living and focus on their role.
No I think the problem is that they even exist and this religious organization as a whole.
Minimus
Family ties. But the clock is running on that one.
As far as my involvement, you’d truly be surprised how little involvement it takes to appear robust in the Borg.
And thanks to Covid19, even less. In fact, I haven’t had to do anything Borgish in a good long time. Other than don my Z and show the face on Zoom occasion.
Less and less as time progresses, and the Borg dies.
Did I have a good relationship with the elders? Well, one shook my hand as they disfellowshipped me. Is that a good relationship?
