Don't give them 2019

by snare&racket 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • snare&racket

    I am writing the post I have wanted to write for some time. It's a heartfelt note to those still attending meetings, still caught between the lines of Watchtower and the World. Those with kids or a spouse in the society..... despite being mentally out....those who have weighed up that there is too much to lose in leaving.

    Who am I to offer advice, information or instruction on what anyone should do? You've already been lied to, manipulated, deceived by the people in whom you entrusted your faith, your life, your family, your children! It is foolish to trust someone such as myself, here espousing 'wisdom' on an Internet forum of all places........and yet what is a person in my shoes to do?

    I have been the commited Jehovah's Witness baptised at 15, pioneer at 16, bethel at 18. I was the JW refusing blood for an urgent medical procedure. I was the JW that walked past my sister, head down when she was disfellowshipped. I was the JW building Kingdom Halls, renovating Assembly Halls. I was the JW on circuit and district assembly platforms. I was the JW that turned my back on educstion, careers, a secure future in this world, i even turned away from JW females I was deeply fond of... Jehovah's will as set out by the american head office was my roadmap!

    Despite this,,,,,I am also the exjw.

    I am the exjw who told the elders I no longer belived the 'truth' was the truth because of contradicting doctrines, scriptures and conscience. I was the exjw who lost all my friends and most of my family in one night with said elders. I was the exjw living out my car awaiting a college course to start. I was the exjw who worked hard to get into and through six years of university. I was the exjw who met a girl and has been in love with her ever since. I am the exjw who now tesches at the same univeristy i attended. I am the exjw who has just had a huge and wonderful Christmas with loving and caring people around me..... it was incredible, despite my age (late 30's) Christmas is just magical!

    I'm the exjw who over the last ten years has helped 8 family members and several friends leave the 'truth'. I am an exjw who read the bible 3 times to see what the JW's were getting so wrong, I also read the Quaran. I was the exjw who got the history books out and devoured information on ancient civilizations and the forming of religions, including the relatively recent writing of the bible. The very questions i ignored as a JW I now faced head on! I devoured biblical texts and debates, lectures & ideas. I was the exjw that was hungry for knowledge and scoured the accessible books on science, physics, evolution and ancient humans. I was the exjw who built up the bravery to read the ex governing body member, Ray Franz memoirs 'A crisis of conscience'.... hands shaking as I began to read, I realised I had been manipulated. I had been brainwashed! Here I was with a book in my hands, having a physical reaction due to fear. Why was i so scared to read something negative about Watchtower???...because i personally 100% wanted to read it! Why would a man fear a book? What had they done to me? The ropes of indoctrination started to come loose.....

    I was the exjw who trusted nobody, no idea, no belief system... I cared not for anyone else's interpretation of anything. I only knew my motives and agenda so sought out all the data in order that I could decide what is likely true for myself.... I realised those men in bethel were nothing special, quite the opposite! I could read, i could decide for myself!

    I am the exjw that went from being mentally chained down to bronze age doctrine, intepreted by unlearned men whose livelihood and that of their wives depended on followers never doubting or being permitted to question their utterings.... and i broke free of those chains and became empowered snd self determined. Looking back I saw a dangerous, dark and closed minded cult behind me..... full of people i loved. People with a need for humanity, being policed by their 'brothers and sisters' in a spiritual fascist regime. Children are denied love, joy, freedoms.... all under the pretense that it was in their best interests.... your OWN children's happiness dictated by men you would never meet who have never lived in the real world, who have never had their own offspring or family unit. With no education in theology they tell you gods wants on their own behalf, should give them! With no education in history or sciences they dictate the make up of the world around you, to you....for you dont have the intelelctual means to interpret the science yourself or the spiritual awareness to know when substituting experimental results with biblical verses are required. Without relevant qualifications in psychology, psychiatry, care, support or mental health they dictate interaction betwen their members from dating to divorce... including sex, abuse, violence, development, clothing, entertainment, dating, your vocabulary and even your thoughts!

    So how can I not speak up? those of you still chained to the JW's, still too fearful to doubt or question. So tied down mentally, so invested to not even have the autonomy to prevent your own children succumbing, should the need for blood arise. To those who in 2018 are living in such fear and obediance to the organisation that they are denying their children the most incredible things in life.... autonomy, a free mind, a free life, birthdays ane christmas with YOU....

    How can I see both sides of this fence ans not speak up? How can I not scream from the rooftops....

    That you should not waste one more day in the 'truth'!

    That leaving is as simple & as easy as simply leaving.

    That yes It'sfrightening to take the step...but then its done!

    That it will be the best decision of your life

    That your ONLY regret will be that you didn't do it sooner

    That your life will find balance, peace and deep joy

    That you get your REAL family back, your extended blood relstives who miss you dearly

    That real life awaits you NOW!

    That a paradise earth (not one bible verse peomises it or even uses that phrase) is an unseen, unproved future, promised you by an American religion, younger than Coca-cola, led by untrained, uneducated men that have spent 100 years giving out false dates for the end of the world, claims and flip-flopping doctrines that evolve to 'new light' when proven false ....a religion now famous for paedophilia and selling property portfolios!

    But who am I to tell you? Who am I to convince you that you and your family can be happier this side of the road from the Jehovahs Witnesses?

    Think about it from the JW perspective.... i could indeed be the most unkind man, evil to the core, seeking to pull you away from the only truth there is....a doctor of medicine and tesching by day....trying to pull JW's out of the real truth by night!

    Or.....i could just be me, the JW who became an exJW and was desperate to inform you just how good life can be if you dare to question what you believe. Just look and see how twisted it is, look how scared you are to EVEN question. Surely you know that is not normal? Not healthy! Not what truth needs.... truth doesnt need protecting, it's self evident snd cant be proven wrong, though lies can be....very easily.

    For those of you still in, still going to meetings, still giving the WT society your time, your thoughts, your efforts..... come join us in the real life!

    Your children deserve you to be that brave, your spouse does, your loved ones too.... but mostly ... YOU deserve it. Don't give them 2019....... take your lives back from the society!

    It's as simple as ssying enough is enough.....

    an exJW

    Snare x

  • James Jack
    James Jack

    WOW! Sounds like my life! Well written

  • OnTheWayOut

    I want to say that we actually do understand that it is tough to walk away and fundamentally change your kids' lives, their friendships and possibly their family communication.

    If its just you, decide for yourself. But if you think keeping your kids in so they don't lise contact with Grandma and their cousins, stop and really think about it. There is so much that a JW child must miss out on. It has hurt for awhile, but its going to hurt more if they leave as young adults.

    That's all.

  • waton

    wow! s&r

    But if you think keeping your kids in otwo

    is easy if you are pimo. they will rebel and "stay in", perhaps pimo too! like you, an to your liking!, and have your glimmer of freedom hope and most importantly, be sheltered for a while from the worst case scenario that has happened in the booby traps of todays's society,also gives them stable friendships for the price of sitting in cars while "not homes" are being done again and again ha ha.

  • oppostate

    Okay, well, your story started really interesting and then it went on and on and I must confess, I didn't read 2/3 of the thing. Your writing style is very much like a stream of consciousness piece.

    My suggestion, say what you need to say in fewer words in future posts. Otherwise you run the chance that folks aren't going to invest the time to read everything you thought you'd say for their benefit.

  • zeb

    A full on account. Well done.

    I take a queue from apostate.The influence of wt is still there in that jw will always use 50 words if 10 will do. But your courage and concern positively radiates.

    Teaching in college wow what an achievement and of course it pays better than cleaning windows..

    Hugs my friend hugs

    congratulations to the max.. and consider all you have been through to be a granite foundation to your life now.

  • smiddy3

    I too appreciated your post s&r and commend you for what you have achieved on leaving JW`s. Well done.

    You have a pm.

  • Wasanelder Once
    Wasanelder Once

    Points well taken. Please, please, please edit your work. If you are in academia you know that its critical to make it clear. Concise is good too. Better two medium posts than one epic tome. Many will not read it all, too bad. Glad you posted this. Post again leaving us hungry for more.

  • Muddy Waters
    Muddy Waters

    Awesome, thank you.

  • Xanthippe
    Franz memoirs 'A crisis of conscience'.... hands shaking as I began to read, I realised I had been manipulated. I had been brainwashed! Here I was with a book in my hands, having a physical reaction due to fear. Why was i so scared to read something negative about Watchtower???...because i personally 100% wanted to read it! Why would a man fear a book? What had they done to me?

    Well said. Why be afraid of any book? I remember the fear I felt when I read this book. To me this is the true mark of a cult that people are made to feel terrified of ideas that contradict it.

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