by Tornintwo 21 Replies latest jw friends
Diogenesister has good advice, you can often get free financial and debt counseling through your bank. They can help you set up a plan even if your husband's isn't on board.
Dubstepped it sounds to me like you guys did all the work, not a miracle of God. Congrats on getting out of debt. Your attitude and method reminds me of Dave Ramsey's school of thought.
Don't forget the lovely little quip "God won't give you more than you can handle". Ugh, I hate these phrases some days.
Sorry, I know that's not advice. I'm kind of in your same position and just taking it day by day. I've gone back to college to finish my degree so I can make double the income I make now, so take that GB!
This was one of the biggest issues I had with this religion!!
I came into the religion as a young single woman with a full-time job to support myself, since money doesn't grow on trees! Over time, I came to be criticized because I could not be "spiritual" enough if I worked full-time.
I was ADVISED that I should quit my decent job (with benefits) and do housecleaning and pioneer. The thought was repugnant to me and made no sense. I was torn inside about this! So, one day I helped an older sister clean a house. It took several hours to do this (with two of us) and I was told I'd have to do two a day if I was to make enough money to survive, (not to mention strain on my back and knees from manual labor plus exposure to chemicals on a daily basis!)
I knew that this was NOT for me and I put the issue to rest in my mind. I also looked around the hall and saw that not all did housecleaning and the woman I helped was MARRIED and just did it for extra money. She was NOT supporting herself!!! I thought to myself that I'd have to be out of my mind to listen to these people.
The price I "paid" because I refused to pursue poverty was that I was viewed as "materialistic" and not "spiritual" and was not invited to special gatherings. But, the funny thing was, NO smart people in the hall pursued poverty either apparently. There were some affluent types..I got the sense there is a double standard for single women - and I certainly wasn't following it.
I have been out for fifteen years and I come here to see what is happening in the religion.
While I feel badly about the predicaments of the bethelites and special pioneers who are being let go, some bethelites have, in the past, made callous remarks about people like me who worked full time - well now they're going to learn what life in the REAL world is like....I am very glad I am not in the congregations now to have the hat passed around to me to contribute money (Imagine the nerve?). Nope!!....Let their so-called "spiritual" friends give them money! Good luck.
Last night I heard the CO outline for 2015 about "Inspired truth" & "Inspired falsehoods" (in Spanish) and he listed Saving For The Future as a teaching of the demons!
He also listed higher education.
"Seek kingdom first" if you want to be dirt poor. It's insane what the GB ask for the pioneers, specially when no one from the territory is getting baptized. Being a need greater is a waste of time, sorry LITS. Being a pioneer is a waste of time. There so much you can learn and do. JW don't have any ambition to create to invent. That damages people's thinking and are more easily brain washed.
I just started to go to college four months ago. I have learned more in four months, then all my life as JW. Is clear for me the reason they don't want to you to get higher education.
Wow Dubstepped, Epic post and great answers everyone. Same here, business owner. Was criticized one morning after having made time to go to the book study how I was trying to achieve financial independence, in front of the whole group. I retorted that I like to pay my bills. The look on the book study conductor ( the one who fired off the insult ) was priceless as we say ! Oh the same guy blasted me for buying a nice cnc machining center that gave us the capacity to do some special work that put our company on the map. Small mindedness, but then again nothing is too good for the GB retirement compound ! Had I of known then what I now..
I escaped the Borg by the skin of my teeth due to the fact that I'm a workaholic and don't know any other way to be. I almost gave up and sold all at one point is the extent of the fight that was going on in my head. Common sense and medication prevailed, seriously it got that bad.
What hypocrisy!! So apparently it is o.k. if Mr. Elder with wife and kids to have full time job with benefits. But a single woman in the Borg to have a full time job with benefits, with no other income and with paying sky high rent is labelled as weak.
This was one of the things I struggled with. Mr. Elders is so poor I guess. He has a motor home, boat, living on an acreage and vacations twice a year or more to tropical places. I have always struggled with this mind set. Nauseating.
Hindsight is 20/20 but what could have been said to you to have prevented this from happening? Some people have put off getting married or having children because they wanted to "seek the kingdom first". Once you can see that you have choices then you can start making your own. Maybe start to separate your finances from your husbands and do what you can to get out of debt and live your life the way you want to.
