It Ain't Easy Being Green

Loris

FROG JOKE A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her
name plate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So, he says,
"Mrs.Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long
vacation." Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he
wants to borrow. The frog says "$30,000."

The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit
Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger,
and that it is OK he knows the bank manager. Patti explains that
$30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to
secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything
he can use as collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain
elephant, about half an inch tall. Bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the
manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and
says: "There is a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to
know you and wants to borrow $30,000. And he wants to use this as
collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what the heck
is this?"

(are you ready?)

"It's a knick knack, Patti Whack. Give the frog a loan.
His old man's a rolling stone." Loris

shamus

You are a very naughty girl. Very naughty.

Euphemism

Ouch! That was horrible! *throwing peanuts at Lori*

Simon

groan

Who votes for a deletion? Hell ... that's worthy of a beheading!

LOL

Gopher

OKAY, LoriS -- one bad joke deserves an even worse one!!

Once upon a time, there was Larry the Lobster and Sam the Clam. They were the best of friends. One day, they were both killed. Larry the Lobster went to Heaven and Sam the Clam went to Hell. Larry the Lobster missed Sam the Clam so much, he asked God if he could go to Hell to visit Sam. God agreed, but he told Larry not to forget his harp.

Larry the Lobster agreed and down to Hell he went. When he found Sam the Clam, he had his own Disco in hell. Larry the Lobster had such a great time with Sam the Clam, that he lost all track of time. Larry heard the voice of God saying "Larry you must come back to Heaven."

Larry ran as fast as he could back to Heaven. When God saw Larry, he said, "Where is your Harp?"

Larry replied, "I left my Harp in Sam Clam's Disco."

TruckerGB

Off with the head and may thunderbolts strike

Loris

Ok Gopher the gloves are off.

Steve was a very busy man. He couldn't seem to get anything done. He had work at the office, odd jobs at home, and the missus wanted to be wined and dined.

So off Steve went to the Clone Factory. His new clone was just like him. Steve had so much to do at the office and you know Steve he can't trust anyone to do his work. Not even the clone. So he sent the clone to a fancy restaurant with the missus.

when he traded places with the clone the next day and went home, he got lambasted by the Missus. It seems that the clone got drunk and was being so vulgar to the other patrons and the waiter they got thrown out of the restaurant. The Missus was threatening separation if Steve didn't straighten up.

Day three he sent the clone to work and he stayed home. He lost two of his best clients because of the clone's dirty mouth.

That was all he could stand. He took the clone up to a high cliff and pushed him over.

Just as Steve was leaving the scene the Police showed up and of course Steve was charged with

Are you ready for this?

Are you sure?

Poor Steve was charged with making

"an obscene clone fall"

Loris

How do you catch a Unique Rabbit?/?????

Get ready...

U-neak up on it!

How do you catch a tame rabbit?

The tame way.

Bleah.

It Ain't Easy Being Green

Loris

shamus

Euphemism

Simon

Gopher

TruckerGB

Loris

Hamas

Frannie Banannie

shamus

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