I understand your feeling of relief and closeness to God. I never felt close to God when in the Borg. As soon as I stopped attending meetings regularly, I started praying, "If this is the right religion, let me know" OR "If this good news is to be preached, how can I do it without being a JW?" I actually felt like I got answers to my prayers for the first time. I would have my little epiphanies as I called them. All of a sudden things would make sense and I was sure I was doing the right thing leaving the Borg. It is good to know other people did similar things.