Well, after 2 + years my 51 year old born in brother in law is finally getting dunked Saturday. I am exceptionally unhappy about this. It means it could spark a change in my husband that could end our marriage, or it could cause a previously carefully planted seed to finally grow. I just wish I knew.
I dunno, maybe he just wants a wife, as I am sure he will have the pick of the crop if he keeps up the zealous activities. He was married at 16 then divorced a year later. ( Child from the relationship/marriage is his only, and he has 4 grandchildren now) . He never dated again in all those years.
He's not such a weird fellow, he is nice, generous, sense of humor, maybe a bit odd with mannerisms but not bad looking. I just don't get it unless he refused to ever want a relationship after his first wife ( she was a bit psychotic during those years I heard) he spends each day with his parents, all this time.
He was inactive completely until about 3 or 4 years ago them boom. During the big campaign to get the "lost ones" back. My husband was sucked in as well. My husband is not going to meetings ( due to my initial intolerance to his attempt to convert me, then my frantic recognition while really learning TTATT that happened in a time of my life when so many other major life events were going on I almost, ( or maybe did ) have a breakdown) , but he told me today he will attend the baptism.
I am trying with all my might to keep myself from focusing on the worry. I have tried so dam* hard to plant seeds of doubt in his still indoctrinated mind. This will be one big test to see if I wasted all that time. It may draw him right back in. It may not.
I want to just forget it all. Escape someplace, in my mind or physically.
Ok I am having a massively bad time right now as might be apparent. Healthwise I hurt all over, constantly. I cry daily. Anxiety is so out of control.... I am making another endocrinologist appt to see if it is organic again.
Sorry for the rant and hijack.