Being Bad in the Kingdom Hall

by Funchback 19 Replies latest jw experiences

  • rebel8

    I used to play a lot of practical jokes. I poked people's asses through the seats, in the crack between the backrest and the seat. I put a tape recorder in the basement and played a haunted house tape. I changed the words of songs ever so slightly while singing them. I made silly noises during prayers. I figured out which bros were wearing clip on ties and pulled them out.

    The most naughty thing I did is have independent thinking.

  • hoser

    When I was a teenager some kids I knew from another hall brought a small cooler full of beer to the district convention.

  • sparky1

    Way back, when I still had a key to the Kingdom Hall, I used to go inside when no one was around. The metal file cabinet with all the congregation records became my own personal reading library. Although it was locked, I knew how to trip the lock by hand and get into the 'secret files'. When I was done reading, I would put the files back and reset the lock. No one ever knew. The coolest thing that I found out involved an Elder that had moved into our congregation. He claimed to be of the anointed and was kind of a jerk. The letter from his former congregation said that he had left abruptly under suspicious circumstances but they did not know of any sins that he committed. If the new congregation wanted to appoint him as an Elder that was their business. At any rate, on numerous occasions, the anointed Elder would give service talks and go on and on that he was sent to this congregation by the Society to help it out and strengthen it. "Did you know that? Did you know the Society sent me here to HELP this congregation?" Bullshit artist of the highest order. I never told anyone else what I knew from reading the files. It was really none of my business, so I figured it was definitely none of anyone else's business.

  • janusfulcrum

    A friend I knew challenged her sister with a bet. Go to the meeting naked and I'll give you $10. Her sister, a teenager, took the bet and went to the meeting buck naked, except for her coat and boots. My friend kept hoping her sister would get asked to do a substitute talk and have to explain why she couldn't take her heavy winter coat off.

  • purrpurr

    Since waking up from the Borg, I regularly go to the bathroom mid meeting and have a little pleasurable fun time by myself. Makes enduring the meetings alot easier I can tell you!

    I highly recommend it ;)

  • stillin
    Haha, purr purr! My teenage son hated the meetings. One of the elders "discreetly" informed me that my son was wanking in the men's room stall and would I please do something about it.
  • Witness My Fury
    Witness My Fury

    Purrpurr you need to get someone in there to help you, just to tick it up a few notches on the naughty scale.

  • burnedout

    I liked to make 'adjustments' to the talk schedules posted on the bulletin board. A few double ended arrows here and there, between names to indicate a switch had been made. It worked once, causing some confusion as to who was supposed to do the next talk.

  • Witness My Fury
    Witness My Fury

    I once did a sound check by farting loudly in the mic. Only another MS and his wife was there unfortunately, the tears did flow from the hilarity.

  • blondie

    A little 4 year old daughter farted at a book study at a home just as her conductor father asked the question. The reader could not stop laughing to read, the only other reader was laughing and crying. No one could stop and as the smell wafted through the room it started all over again. That meeting ended with a quick prayer.

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