Just had huge arguement outside hall....

by Gadget 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • Pistoff

    What a colossal idiot this elder is. Not even concerned with perception of how he shepherds, he is only covering his jurisdictional arse.

    I know from experience elders care very little about depression; if they don't acknowledge it as such, but instead look it as being discouraged, then it can be "cured" by more service study and meetings. End of liability.

    Remember, JR Brown called then unpaid, untrained volunteers.

  • Gadget
    And you're depending on ELDERS to "check on her"?

    I've been doing what I can to help her, and persuaded her to get professional help. The problem is that the distance we are apart I can't always see her so I wanted to make sure the people who are seeing her most were aware of the situation. I've got no contact No for the people in her hall who've been seeing her but I know the elders in my hall have and so would have been able to pass the message on for me.

    I went to work this morning, but had a chat with my boss and now I have leave until Sunday night so I'm going to go down and see her. I'll be seeing her during the day, but don't think we'll be able to on the nights, so if anyone within reasonable travelling distance of Liverpool wants to meet up for a quiet beer or something pm me and I'll give you my phone number.


  • qwerty


    Only just seen this Topic today. I hope your girlfriend is OK.

    I can not believe the Elders reaction to your request. Jurisdiction and all that, shows how stuck to rules and regulations they are!

    Shame your girlfriend does not live near me. You could have kipped at my house, without having to worry about accommodation. Still can if you are in the area.


  • Angharad

    Hope she's ok Gadget, and you can help her

  • lawrence

    Hope your friend is feeling and doing better! These controlled automaton elders do have "jurisdictions", as do the demons, who are rulers of specific dominions, and are principalities in different regions. Fitting then that they follow their father, the ruler of darkness. No wonder that the organization is so "well-organized" to the naked eye.

  • qwerty

    Never thought of that before Lawrence, makes sense, good point!


  • Gadget

    I went down to see her, but she refused to see me at first because she didn't want to do anything to put me getting reinstated at risk. She finally agreed to meet up. She's fine physically, but a real mess mentally, attempting suicide in the last few weeks which I just found out about when I was down there. Problem is she hasn't told her doctor anything about whats been happening with us, because she didn't want to 'give a bad witness' to the doctor'. This really pissed me off, and I persuaded her to tell the doctor the whole story. She can't help her if she doesn't know whats going on. She kept going on about how much she's desperate for me to get reinstated, and that the only thing she could never ever deal with is if I became an apostate. How can I tell her that I don't think I'll be able to get reinstated, and how I really feel about the wbts?


  • cruzanheart
    She kept going on about how much she's desperate for me to get reinstated, and that the only thing she could never ever deal with is if I became an apostate.

    Dear Gadget, I am so sorry that she is having such mental difficulties, but please take care of YOURSELF and don't allow her to put any emotional blackmail on you. The only way a marriage will work is if both people are true to themselves and like each other that way. Otherwise you're living a lie and you will come to hate both yourself and her. I hope this doesn't sound harsh, but I hate to see you caught in a situation where you feel compelled to go back to an abusive religion because if you don't she'll kill herself. That's not fair to you, or to her, because she has to learn to stand on her own two feet too.

    Keep us posted!


  • blondie

    Gadget, if she won't be honest with her doctor, you try talking to her/him. You are engaged after all. When you say suicide, do you mean a seriousl attempt? I'm surprised she wasn't hospitalized. This sounds like emotional blackmail to me; and I've been on receiving end from my family. Just as Nina said, she needs to learn to stand on her own. A good marriage is made up of 2 whole people not 2 halves trying to make a whole. I'll e-mail you later.


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