When was it time for you to walk away from your congregation meetings and the WTBTS?

by RULES & REGULATIONS 42 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  ZindagiNaMilegiDobaara

  @Sickandtired

  It was not easy.It was a real challenge, uphill struggle, not without tears ofcourse.

  At first I would always gently nudge my partner witha question as if I could not understand why /why not kind a question. If found something discussed at the meeting , I would come home and speak about it and say it just semms weird, strange or quite the opposite of what I believe the bible says or maybe I am getting it wrong. Always questioning gently, never challenging even if the answer given was weirder/ not sounding right . I would leave it at that, I would never keep on discussing till my partner saw things my way. I honestly believe that one can only take a horse to a water source but one cannot make the horse drink it! Therefore never argued on the answers I got. Just raised doubts and left it.

  For eg when I first heard about the CA cases, i researched everywhere to find ttatt of it all but did not go out and share the whole lawsuits and all court documents with my partner.The reason I did this is coz When I learned about these things I was scared shitless, thinking about apostates, satan leading me away from truth and had panic attacks,felt suffocated n all. So it took me a lot of courage to continue my research and see the TTATT. I feel my partner would be feeling all this too when faced with the same things about jdumbs so I took it gently, slowly, patiently.

  So I also read about a lawsuit from a local congregation in the papers. I, in passing mentioned the news with my partner and said how can the elders ignore such a criminal amongst us and let him roam freely; how could a paedophile hold an elders position? and left it at that. I did not think my partner would dwell too much on it.

  Fast forward 3 weeks , both of us were out having coffee with an elder after the min, when I was out of earshot the elder mentioned this case to my partner and shared his concerns.My partner then mentioned that yes it had been brought to my partners attention and it is a shame if it is true..bringing dishonor to gods name and all that. At this the leder mentioned that it is true and he is following the case (as a lawyer).

  When we got home my partner (now that he had double confirmation of the news) started discussing about it. I was glad to discuss it but only about this specific case.I did not overload my partner with the lawsuits all over the world.This will definitely suffocate and make my partner close the doors on the subject. I wanted to leave it on my partners terms.

  After some time when I hear of another news item about another lawsuit, I would just share it, and leave it at that. Never try to disclose all there is to disclose.I think this easy, gentle way has helped a lot instead of bombarding with all there is to know about TTATT and drowning my partner. I have had to have self-control for this.

  Many times I could see my partner getting upset when I share/ question something.As soon as I notice this vibe I would move away from the topic coz that is a sure sign of trying to close doors and cult-mind clocking in.

  2. example .When I realized the money grab, bethel invites for people in our congregation despite others being made redundant in the past for silly excuses. We also have been through this.(mind you both of us have done regular pioneering , special pioneering, translation work, were in bethel, been in need greater too, so we have seen much). At the meetings whenever they said that we have a letter to read to all in the congregation. I would nudge my partner and say "no doubt asking for more money". When almost everytime this is exactly what happened through the letter, my partener started to realise and see things differently a little. As time went on , I shared about KH sales..in time just added in drips and drabs .Never argued to prove a point, always questioning or leave with a statement hanging in the air.

  It has worked and now we are out. For me this awaking others is never about proving the jdumbs wrong but about helping people see TTATT, what they do with the info is their look out and decision.

  Sorry it has been so long a post
  

  I can write a lot of things which will be very long.

  But all I can say is wait your turn, give people the time for things to register, let them think for themselves and never conclude for them or get confrontational.They have to come to their conclusions on their terms, in their own time.

  If you like I have posted many other points in my comments, just go through them as well, it may help.
  

  So far I have helped at least 15 people awake and fade successfully. This is the method I use. I have shared experiences and such things in my posts. If you feel inclined do read them.

  My very best wishes to you and yours.

  Zing
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  I needed it to be "the truth." Long story, but I fully invested in that. I came in in 1987 and got baptized in 1988 as an adult with a JW mother. There was relative stability for a few years at that time. The shakeup of 1980 was unknown to me and I was too young to know much about the 1975 doctrines that captured my mother.
  
  1995's generation change started me realizing that even "the truth" wasn't constant. And that bugged me, but I plugged along. 10 years past 1995, I had seen double standards and nepotism, elders thinking they know what Jehovah wants more than others because they can spout off scriptures and paraphrase the Watchtower article that elaborates on them. The religion wasn't about upbuilding each other, it was about staying in line.
  
  So a series of events that seemed non-Christian to me (well- unloving and controlling) started me to examine Watchtower. I pioneered for a year, giving Jehovah one last chance to prove himself to me in my life, but I also started reading secular thoughts on Bible history and science teachings on what fossils, archaeology and the universe say about where we came from and how we came to be. I actually held back for awhile about actually going to "apostate" materials. But one day, I said to myself, "What prevents me from googling 'Watchtower' and going wherever it takes me?"
  
  Between my personal experiences and the internet, although it had taken me a long time to realize that the Watchtower did not have "the truth," it only took me a short while to know that the organization always puts itself ahead of the individuals and that any good people within were only good despite the Watchtower. I didn't need to stay within the organization.
  
  So my eyes opened fast to read about false prophecies and a Governing Body member with a book and coverups over various stuff. I resigned as an elder in 2006 and faded extremely fast to stop going to meetings at all by the Memorial of 2007.
  
  Before fading away, I actually hinted strongly at problems within the organization and I am pretty sure the C.O. instructed the elders to steer clear of me. Y'all know- Somehow, I could weaken their faith too. So they have given me very little attention in all the time since then despite my never disassociating.
• 

  Zilgee

  @Zing

  What about those places where there are few witnesses and nothing comes on newspaper? How do we wake such people who are not exposed to ttatt?
• 

  lancelink

  my parents were in since I was 12, and they helped in any way they could with the hall, assemblies, and new people. They retired down south, and when my Mom died only 5 people contacted me or sent cards, not one elder was in the mix. At that time I was slowly beginning to fade away, but after seeing that "absolute conditional love", I made a beeline out of the org. I wrote a letter to the elders, and new York explaining that I was out, and wanted nothing to do with this religion. I heard later that The elders ignored my letter, thinking that I was just depressed and would soon snap out of it. But when they got a message from the corporate office, that really lit a fire underneath them and one month later, they were basically falling over each other to get in contact with me trying to be encouraging. I ignored the whole crew and walked away with absolutely no regrets.
• 

  ZindagiNaMilegiDobaara

  @Zilgee

  I think for such ones you may need to :

  1. prove unconditional love(share your personal experiences, one at a time and attach a scripture to it which shows what was done was wrong; and let it hang) is BS.

  2. Show stuff on jw.borg via videos .Finding statements they make which are fabricated to suit their needs.internet does help towards this.

  3. Start pinpointing things that are quite in contrast to what the bible says and what really is happening/ being delivered (perhaps peoples actions which in my experience would be double standards). Choose the right moments to bring something to their attention and just say that am I wrong in understanding that the bible says at matthew 7:12 do unto others...Why did /does bro A treat me like this ie being rude to you, ignoring you, belittling you unfair to you (not to be petty but serious ones and if done often then it does raise questions) etc anything that is wrong as per the bible and leave the statement hanging unless they come up with an answer. Check the vibe you get from their answer if negative towards what you are saying then leave it there without discussing further.If positive /agree that was wrong then dont pursue too much into it but still leave it there saying "it does upset me that my bro treats me like this.Love is the identifying mark and he is doing quite the opposite.Oh well I wil leave it in Gods Hands" .

  No confrontation at all .If you bring different points to the table from the bibles angle plus works then gradualy in time atleast one point will make them think.

  Eg. when my father passed away we went through a helluva time with mishap after mishap so meetings/ ministry were out the window totally for 3 months.We did call two elders and let them know of our loss, believing they wll let others in the cong know .This is common courtesy/decency, right. During all of this not one bro/sis popped in or call us, or send a card .When we finally resumed our meeting it hit us that not one person knew (ofcourse the BOE did not inform anyone about our loss so no one called or bothered to even know how we were; this still does not let them off for not enquiring after us does it).The elders had not told anyone.I took this badly coz all this talk about in corinthians how we are one body and if one arm aches the whole body is affected n all.In truth it is all bs. Was love the identifying mark here??

  I am sure you will find many such bad examples of works not adding up to what a true christian should be like.

  If you keep asking or just drop statements and let it hang, I am sure sooner or later the penny will drop. Make sure you do not come across as the enemy,then it defeats the purpose of waking them up.

  I have stated that I have left things in Gods hands (a statement they shove in your face often) and am waiting on him to show to me I am wrong ". "What does it take for god to show one who has given all his/her life to him that he cares and I am wrong ,guide me to the right way of thinking". They should be able to see that you are wanting to stick with the truth but if the truth itself is not delivering itself to be the truth you are left with no choice.

  There is no identical situations in life mate so you have to think of ways to gently nudge them without losing patience.

  I am sure there is partiallity, elders family being treated differently and the R n F treated differently specially when it comes to going up the ladder or when one takes a misstep. Align it with the bibles standards and bingo you have something to discuss.

  Another point maybe the number of anointed one s left on the earth.It has gone from 8800 to over 20000.This just does not make sense to me ever. If you do research through the yearbooks you will notice how it has increased instaed of diminishing .

  Generation change another point in itself.Tread carefully as on egg shells and it will work if given time.

  Hope this helps.

  Zing
• 

  ZindagiNaMilegiDobaara

  @Zilgee

  Also ask why the hell does the society TELL you which hotels to stop in for conventions? is there job to give spiritual food or be intrusive and rule our every move? which verse supports this?

  donations are supposed to be voluntary why the hell do they tell us /make us make a pledge to give so much..monthly to the society? By the way there are at least 5 different types of contributions we all are supposed to give. I see no verse supporting those.

  All these higher ups CO, DO, branch representatives ,gb travelling first class instyle does not align with a life of poverty pledge they sign does it. is there life simple? We are suposed to lead a simple life but not them? can you imagine jesus travelling first class...what do the scriptures reveal...jesus did not have a roof over his head.

  Of course in not so many words but gently, smoothly.

  Zing
• 

  Finkelstein

  Answer = for me it was when I realized what was coming out of the WTS wasn't the truth.

  I felt I was involved and participating in preaching a false gospel of Jesus, tainted with commercialism.

  I was right.
  
• 

  Zilgee

  It's difficult to convince born ins.
• 

  ZindagiNaMilegiDobaara

  I agree it is a challenge Zilgee but I am a born intoo. I woke up by myself. With no help off of the internet and anyone else. Could not afford any comforts of life coz led a simple life attending to basic needs and devoting time to this cult. Yet, started having doubts, struggled with myself to see through the fog of lies but ultimately came through to the light.

  Have some faith mate!

  Zing
• 

  jookbeard

  the early 1990's, a born in had a walkabout phase on my teens got interested again. baptised in the late 1980's, married in 1990 (huge mistake) and during the Waco siege my interest was aroused with the media focusing on cults and sects and I began to research, I was done , by 1993 my fade started but did attend the memorial that year my last ever, our marriage continued to deteriorate and we divorced in 1995, moved away, new career and life was starting all over again, dabbled in a little bit of evangelical Christianity but it simply wasn't for me, been an atheist ever since and never set foot in a KH since, and as some have said during the last year of my miserable marriage i really did hit rock bottom, my mental state was something I needed to salvage and luckily I did.