It has been over a year and a half since my last ceremony. Which was way to long.
My son came up from Scottsdale for the ceremony. We have done Ayahuasca together about six times. However the last time he did it was March 17, 2011, over seven years ago.
As they say. "When the student is ready the teacher arrives."
Since the medicine will give you what you need and not what, there is always a bit of excitement but also a disquiet concern for what will be coming your way.
There were fifteen of us there from all over the United States, one lady came from Australia. Most the people there were in their thirties and forties. Their were people there who had made this journey dozens of times before and a half dozen of first timers.
We were at a beautiful secluded home nestled among the red rocks. Everything was perfect for sure.
I had no way of knowing that within 12 hours my world would be turned upside down once again.
The answers my unconscious mind was looking for would soon be here.
We all took the medicine about 9:00 pm. It was one of the the mildest experiences I ever had with no purging.
There were many interesting feelings and thoughts. Then there was sleep also. I did get up and went outside to sit by a lovely camp fire. I ended up having a good conversation with the Shaman's assistant.
We talked about relationships. How that all of them seem to have expiration dates attached to them. Yes though we all want permanence, this can only be an illusion, because everything and everyone are constantly changing.
It the early morning light we all said our goodbyes and went are separate ways.
Later that day our landlord gave us our thirty day notice to vacate our home, since the house we were living in got sold. It is time for to us to move.
Since we had to move, that night the lady I have been with for four years felt it was time for us to separate also. This was coming for awhile but neither of us wanted to look at it. We had been moving in two different directions and were making each other miserable. We both still love each other deeply we just haven't been enjoying the experience. If your not having fun why be together?
Since we own a business together that relationship too would change and would be different in the future.
So yes what an amazing day.
I have just one thing left to do and that is bless everything that comes my way with no judgement.
Believing on some level that no matter how things might look on the outside that I will be exactly where I need to be.
One of the biggest epiphanies I had on Ayahausca was that control was the biggest illusion of them all.
It's all perfect