Why It Is So Easy To Shun Disfellowshipped Family & Friends

by minimus 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • minimus

    I believe that Jehovah's Witnesses have learned through mind-control that a "true" Christian must "disown" all family and friends for the sake of the "truth". If such disowning means leaving relationships with persons that no longer want to remain in the "truth", then that is the choice that THEY are making. Besides, if those that are shunned realize how much love their "brothers and sisters" really have for them, they might come around and get their lives saved after all!........Any comments?

  • freedom96

    I would say that is true, however I believe there is a big element of fear out there. If they do talk with the df'd one, they too can be kicked out.

    There are also those who genuinely feel that "tough love" by not talking to them is the way to go.

    And yet still, there are those who feel superior to those who get kicked out, and it is their chance to act smug in their rather pathetic little lives.

  • Elsewhere

    Most humans (with the exception of a few sociopaths and other mentally ill people) are born with a natural desire to do "good". The problem is that no one is born with "good" defined for them.

    Either through observation and experience or through someone telling them, a person concludes what is and is not "good". Remember when you were little and your mom or teacher said "Oh, that was very good of you! "... it made you feel happy. That sense of happiness was the instinct rewarding you for doing what you perceived as "good".

    This is where cults like the JWs come in... They convince people that Jehover wants them to shun people who are disobedient to the organization or leave the organization. Because this order of shunning is supposed to be coming from Jehover, the greatest source of "good", then the order must be "good"... and they follow the order.

    It is no different than when Moses told people that stoning a disobedient child to death was "good"... so people, wanting to do "good", did stone their children to death.

    It is a “short circuit” in human instinct to do "good".

  • Blueblades

    It might seem that way.Mind control does play a role in it.Fear of it happening to you .Putting the blame on the one disfellowedshipped might make it easy to do and accept shunning.

    Your question brings back to my mind the comment made from Steven Hassan's book "RELEASING the BONDS"empowering people to think for themselves.

    "The phenomenon of destructive mind control indoctrination ( my thought,such as shunning ) can turn an intelligent,educated person with a strong family background into a stranger."

    I think some past post's had something to say about this "Shuning of family members"that many secretly do not follow this teaching,which means that they are not completely under the influence of this destructive mind control indoctrination of the Society when it comes between drawing the line of loyalty to the Society or of family members who are loved .

    I myself made this choice not to follow the policy of shunning my own family members and friends.

    As to it being easy for others to follow this policy, I think not,I believe many are quietly hurting inside when they have to follow something that is tearing them apart emotionally inside.

    These are just my thoughts and comments Minimus.


  • minimus

    I do agree that for many, it is not easy to shun a friend or family member. But some DO have the mindset that if the "slave" says this or that, it's true in an unequivocal way. And what greater show of love but to do as Jehovah and Abraham was willing to do------sacrifice your own flesh and blood for the greater good.

  • integ

    Because they are brainwashed.

  • Ravyn

    I believe it is because the Borg is 'institutionalized'. People convert to JWs out of fear. Fear of the future, fear of death, fear of being 'wrong' with God, etc. So the fear factor is the big hook and it becomes the anchor. Then they stay in the Borg out of even greater fear, convinced that they did not know what they were afraid of before, but now the know and it is even worse then they feared in ignorance! People are so fearful of the 'world' and the future that they are willing to give up everything for the fear. The Borg plays on the natural survival instinct to the sickest extreme. The whole paradigm is based on the fact that if you were in a plane crash in the Andes and ran out of food you would canabalize your fellow travelers.


  • obiwan

    I myself, never found it easy. I actually found it to be difficult. When I did see someone who I new to be df'd, I was more curious than anything, wondering if that person was really that bad.

  • minimus

    You might've been curious but didya talk to 'em?

  • obiwan

    Well, considering I was 12 at the time, and with my parents, no, my father would have beat me senseless.

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