What steps did you take to free yourself from the cult? mentally or physically?

by HereIgo 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Syme

    I stopped going to field service.

    I stopped going to meetings.

    I got rid of all WT publications, though I didn't actually throw them to garbage, but stored them in a deep corner shelf away from my library. I only kept a Bible, but not NWT translation. Of course, when I moved, I did not take the publications with me.

    I threw away or even shredded to pieces all personal notes from conventions, meetings, letters and stuff.

    I deleted the bulk of jw friends from facebook, though I kept a few inner-circle ones that know of my stance and kind of accept it, or at least do not oppose it. But I probably will delete them as well in due course.

    I started doing DF offences, without advertizing it, but without fear of what will happpen if they found out either.

    I refused to even remotely apologize to any high or low ranking jw for my fade. I refused to have any official conversation with the CO, being steadfast without being rude.

    I moved to another town, with no jw contact here. I gradually stopped responding to text messages and answering phone calls from 'concerned' jws.

    Those methods were successful so far, because I didn't let for a second any jw, no matter his rank, to think he has any authority over me. I didn't allow them any space for intrusion, so they didn't intrude.

  • Phizzy

    In the early days I avoided meetings with Elders, until forced to. I dealt with them following expert advice gleaned on here, and they have left me more or less alone since, just the odd knock on the door when they have a campaign on.

    Getting free mentally was the most important thing I found. So I read everything I could, Ray Franz' two books, a number of books by Bart Ehrmann, Richard Dawkins, the great Hitch, Jerry Coine's "Why Evolution is True", and a great book called "Unearthing the Bible".

    This latter had the greatest effect on me, by showing beyond doubt that over 90% of the Bible was fiction, this meant that anything the WT/JW Org says is fiction/bollocks too.

    Very little of 58 years as a JW remains as part of me, thankfully.

  • eyeuse2badub
    Very little of 58 years as a JW remains as part of me, thankfully.

    I'm with you Phizzy on how I freed myself from the clutches of the borg. I also spent about 58 years as a captive. It's pretty damn hard to free yourself from the only thing you ever allowed yourself to know and believe! The pain of facing the reality that the WTBTS is all a hoax was damn near unbearable after devoting nearly 6 decades of your life.

    However, when things within the borg started failing the 'sniff test', that's when I did the unthinkable and started looking into the roots of jw's. The rest is history. I discovered the WTBTS to be very much a man made religion (as they all are) born at a time when people were less educated and/or less informed making them vulnerable.

    Once freed from the borg mentally, it was easy to see that all religion and "holy books" are simply bull sh*t! To me the Bible is simply Hebrew mythology and nothing more.

    Getting free mentally was the most important thing I found.

    just saying!

  • flipper

    HEREIGO- Great thread topic. Thanks for posting it,

    Initially back in 2003 I stopped attending meetings cold turkey- totally stopped. That really stopped the WT indoctrination process in it's tracks- thus freeing my mind up. I too like yourself refused to answer the elders phone calls . Then physically I moved about 45 miles away for a couple years, then moved about 60 - 70 miles away a couple years later and that really helped- although after being out for 3 years my former elders STILL tried to hunt me down. ( Long story - I'll tell you on the phone sometime )

    Also like On The Way Out I read all of Steve Hassan's books on cult mind control , both of Ray Franz's books, read George Orwell's 1984 which exposes a society that is very similar to the control measures used by the WT Society's publications. Read lots of psychology books that dealt with control and how people abuse power in groups, individual relationships, and organizations - either religious or political.

    Also I got heavily involved in becoming a singer/songwriter/guitarist back in late 2011 and I'm almost ready to release my 3rd album of music emphasizing social freedoms and singing about injustices, climate change, various subjects, etc. So that activity has kept me busy and expanded my mind beyond the JW cult for sure. Also am learning to play the banjo and mandolin a little bit. So it's been LOTS of fun pursuing the music. music is a universal healer for all of us.

    My wife and me read a lot of history especially about the horrific treatment of Native Americans on the American continent discovering the real history that made this country " free " for the White Europeans. I'm heavily involved in Ancestry.com which I've researched my mom and dad's family back about 500 or more years now. And the fascinating history you learn from those middle age years is very educational. Also enjoy hiking in the forest and mountains getting back to nature in the back country gives me peace of mind. So there are many activities we can engage in to truly free our mind and bodies from this criminal organization the JW's. I keep busy for sure in my business as well

  • flipper

    Wanted to add I agree with OTWO about getting together with EX-JW's for support and friendships. Nobody understands what we've been through like ex-JW's. Each year we get together at South Lake Tahoe for a informal gathering of ex-JW's and next year will be the 10th year in a row we've gotten together. Usually have about 40 - 50 folks show up from the board from several different states and across California. Hope you can make it next year ! It's a blast. Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Tallon

    Like Flipper has posted, you need to fill the void.

    As a JW your life revolved around meetings, field service, personal study etc. That amounted to a good few hours each week.

    What I did to fill the void was pursue interests. In my case I studied higher education and obtained Chartered membership of my profession. I also enjoy music and play guitar, and enjoy local sightseeing. After work, weather permitting, my wife and I go for walks to keep fit and usually stop off for a coffee at a local cafe on the way back.

  • Vidiot

    Moving is always really useful.

  • Vidiot

    flipper - "...Each year we get together at South Lake Tahoe for a informal gathering of ex-JW's..."

    Orgies, rampant drug abuse, devil worship, and ritual human sacrifice.

    Good, clean family fun.

  • jws

    In the city where I grew up, I happened to move out of the congregation's area. The other side of the city was even a completely different circuit. Maybe even a different district.

    And I became inactive. Nobody really checked up on me to see if I was going to meetings. I certainly wouldn't be expected to drive an extra half hour to go to the same hall. Though when I attended, people knew I'd go out drinking and get into other mischief. They just couldn't pin it on me. So they were probably just glad I was gone.

    During this time, I figured I'd go back someday. Until I read Franz's book. Then decided not to. Nobody followed up. Now I'm 1000 miles away from JWs who know who I am and I don't expect anybody from the old hall to show up.

  • Phizzy

    My wife just pointed out to me that once we had read the real history of the WT/JW Org/Cult/Mess, whatever you want to call it, we could no longer take it as even possibly containing any truth.

    That was very liberating in the early days, and I think Lloyd Evan's upcoming book, "The Reluctant Apostate" will be a very good source for today's JW's to find such information.

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