You know it's time to give up the JW religion when your route call tells you to

by jambon1 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • DJS


    Ditto. I had an identical experience. Best OP of the month and one of the best of the year.

  • notsurewheretogo

    Mental issues are increasing in the world...but it seems more so in the JW land.

    As I have mentioned to many who are still in, it is the fact they are trying to live up to something you cannot really do.

    No-one, not one JW can do everything that is asked/forced on them.

    Think about it.

    • Meetings
    • Ministry
    • Study
    • Prayer
    • Conventions
    • Reading daily the bible
    • Prepare for meetings
    • Family Worship
    • Visit Bethel
    • Show hospitality frequently
    • Donate money frequently
    • No sex out with marriage
    • Curb what you watch, listen to or read

    When a JW fails in one of these areas and then they hear about or read about how a JW can do it in these fake magazine examples they instantly feel like they are not worthy, not good enough...always striving but never getting there.

    This is why JW's suffer mental issues or burnout.

    Once they learn to exit as we did, relax and enjoy our lives as we should then life is much happier!

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    That elderly woman recognized this from the beginning and probably continued taking the magazines out of pity for you and your situation.

    I came to the conclusion after a lifetime of being a JW. that going to the meetings was like going to a funeral 3 times a week. Even the decor of the Kingdom Hall was funeral parloresque. Constant reminders of imperfection, death, sin, Armageddon, pointing out the bad in the world coupled with their feeble Biblical eventually became too much.

  • ToesUp

    Notsurewheretogo said it perfectly . You can never do enough or be good enough . I told this to an elder before we left. The tasks you do measures the spirituality JW's judge you on. You could be the biggest ass but as long as the JW's see what you are doing spiritually (aka tasks). Perseption is everything in JWland. Man I DO NOT MISS THAT!

  • NVR2L8

    I love your account and how this mature womanwaited for the right moment to speak her mind out of concern for your well-being. I had a similar return visit who engaged me on doctrine only using the bible...I dismissed his reasoning by telling myself he was an apostate. Still what he said resonated in me and caused the doubts that led me to researching my beliefs...and here I am!

  • John Free
    John Free

    Nice story, I bet this very nice person wondered what became of you, did you ever get to see her again?

  • steve2

    I wouldn't blame the JW organization for the deep depression I experienced in my teens and twenties - but JW organization sure fed into that gloomy, helpless negativity and milked my FOG (fear, oblingation and guilt) for all it was worth.

    I remember being "chided" for being "spiritually weak" and for lacking trust in Jehovah and his loving provisions.

    Even generally loving JWs (and there were and are some) mistook "Biblical" promises for encouragement.

    One nice elder would reassure me that "soon all of your problems will be solved" and reminded me about the nearness of the end and how "faithful" brothers and sisters are assured of survival. I was far too scared to tell him that it was this very message about the nearness of the end that was so personally burdensome to me because my JW-entrenched thoughts had convinced me that I would not "make it" if the end came and so all effort was no use.

    The initial remedy for my depression: Leaving - I could not have forseen that it was the JW environment itself that sustained my depressed outlook.

  • Giordano

    Eric Hopper is the person that guided me out of the JW religion.

    Not only does a mass movement depict the present as mean and miserable - it deliberately makes it so. It fashions a pattern of individual existence that is dour, hard, repressive and dull. It decries pleasures and comforts and extols the rigorous life. It views ordinary enjoyment as trivial or even discreditable, and represents the pursuit of personal happiness as immoral.

  • jambon1

    For those asking, no, I never saw the woman again. She wasn't old. She was in her 50's.

    I probably should've wrote a card. Actually I had many, many nice regular calls. But when I left I didn't look back. I ran. With absolute no desire to have any link to that part of my life at all.

    I probably regret the way I left actually. I would've served others well had I taken the time to write letters to those who would've benefitted from them.

  • stuckinarut2

    Great opening post!

    I have had a similar thing happen! I am well known in my local business community, and over the last few years I have had several clients comment that "You seem much happier and positive and less stressed or anxious"

    One who knew I was a witness, asked one day "How is your local hall going?" To which I replied simply "Oh, I don't go there anymore" Her reply was priceless: "I Knew it! You are so much calmer and relaxed now. Well done"

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