Name Things That You Can't Do If You Are A Witness

by minimus 48 Replies latest jw friends

  • JH
    JH

    Whatever seems to be FUN, I guess you can't do.

    You must not be friends of pleasure, but rather a friend of God. 2Tim 3:4

    lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

  • mustang
    mustang

    Ask questions about the Bible, religion or "doctrine" (dogma really) that aren't in the list of questions that already have the answer provided !!!!!!!!!

    Mustang

  • Bendrr
    Bendrr

    From my experience:

    Drive a 2-door car.

    (Mine's a Camaro)

    Have loud exhaust on your car, regardless of how many doors it has.

    (it has headers and dual exhaust with glasspacks and NO CATALYTIC CONVERTER, so Jehovah's going to kill me because I violated Caesar's law)

    Have a loud sound system in said vehicle, again regardless of the number of doors.

    (2 JL Audio 12" subwoofers powered by an Alpine V12 amplifier)

    Play questionable music.

    (frequently play 80's metal, dirty country by David Allen Coe, and POLITICAL talk radio like Neil Boortz....BUT ABSOLUTELY NO RAP!)

    Smoke (tobacco or otherwise, but I don't really care much for pot).

    (I'm smoking a Doral Light as I type this)

    Bang someone you're not married to. (oh yeah, you can't drop the F-bomb either).

    (not that that's a problem for me, haven't had a date in a LONG time)

    Wear facial hair below your upper lip.

    (had a goatee but shaved it, can't grow a full beard so not a problem anyway)

    Wear your hair long if you're a man.

    (Mine's halfway down my back. AND IT'S A MULLET!!!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!! IN YOUR FACE, MULLET-HATERS!!!)

    Wear earrings if you're a man.

    (I have 3 holes in my left ear)

    Get tattoos.

    (Rebel flag on my right bicep with a strand of barbed wire wrapped around it and around my arm, soon to get more)

    Cuss.

    (no I don't kiss my momma with this mouth anymore thanks to df'ing)

    Display or salute the flag of your country.

    (I wear an American flag pin on the right lapel of my uniform shirt at work)

    Watch R-rated movies.

    (come check out my big collection of DVD's. But I will say that I don't own porno's and don't particularly care for watching them)

    Sleep late on Sundays.

    (knock on my door before say 10 am on Sunday and see what happens)

    Be ambitious and succeed at your line of work if it isn't janitorial or part-time. And even then don't be too successful.

    (I'm the second-highest paid employee -- including management -- at the shop where I work and in the top 10 for the whole company)

    Associate with worldly people, especially [those deemed] apostates.

    (I'm a Jedi member of a Satanic evil pit of vipers known as www.jehovahs-witness.com)

    Truly be repentant of sins unless you convince men instead of convincing God.

    (which is why I've never tried to get reinstated and why my younger brother is still desparately trying)

    Put your personal relationship with God before your standing in the congregation and THE ORGANIZATION.

    (That's called "running ahead of Jehovah's Organization)

    Read anything other than Watchtower publications, including versions of the Bible other than the New World [mis]Translation.

    (read it 3 or 4 times, that was enough for me)

    Speak your mind.

    (we'd never make it as Witnesses)

    Be Free.

    Mike.

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    Not put Christmas stamps on your letters. ( like Santa Claus-or churches etc)
    Not play the lotto. Not miss meetings. Musnt take the emblems. Not stay at home if company comes as your leaving for the meeting -Not to hug each other at the Kingdom Hall - A sister was told it gives the impression we are lesbians.- Oh Just dont do anything at all >>unless it is reading WT. Awake- Kingdom Ministry>go out in service .

  • IslandWoman
    IslandWoman

    Can't give your non-JW Dad a birthday hug or card.

    Can't give him a Father's day card.

    Can't give him the one thing he truly wanted, a united family.

    Can't give him the full respect he deserved because he was a "worldly" person.

    Can't go back and make it all better because he's dead.

    Linda

  • DevonMcBride
    DevonMcBride

    Can't say "God Bless you" or "Good luck"

    Read your daily horoscope, have a tarot reading or visit a psychic

    Step foot inside another church

  • be wise
    be wise

    You can do anything ...just wait ...not yet ...not in this wicked system, must punish yourself first ...remember JW's, the worse you can make yourself feel now the closer you are to the end ...you bet ya!

  • DJ
    DJ

    You can't be free in Christ

    You can't go to heaven

    You can't spend a holiday with a loved one unless they are as miserable as you

    You can't pray with your jw dad who has brain cancer without a paper napkin on your head

    You can't tell him Happy Birthday and bake him a cake even if he won't be here next year

    You can't have a family who loves you unless you are one of them

    You can't go to a church

    You can't celebrate the day that Christ rose

    You can't pray to "GOD the Father" like Jesus did

    You can't have wind chimes.....they stumble you know....

    You can't be free in Christ, oh yea...I already said that.

  • nowisee
    nowisee

    (((((dj))))) -- so sorry about your dad -- you should find something to celebrate with him anyway. like happy i'm so glad you're here day.

    mouthy - you couldn't hug another sister because they would think you're a lesbian????? how sick is that??

    you can't think for yourself.

    you can't have any independence.

    no holidays or birthdays.

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    you can't think independently

    you can't cause others to think independently

    you can't act independently

    you can't suggest independence outside of the organization

    you can't make an important decision independently

    you can't associate with others who think,act and decide independently of the Watchtower

    In short, you just can't be independent!!

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