"...maybe I shouldn't have left" (page 2)

hippikon

I think living in the “Borg” makes us a bit naive. People are very sheltered and often are not prepared for the realities of outside world. It may make us easy victims Is that a good thing?. I think a great service of this board is to prepare those leaving for the real world.

So is the JW org a good protection from the world?

I think yes (to a degree) but at what cost. Some people are such emotional and intellectual cripples that they need the “Borg” as both a crutch and a shelter. I wouldn’t want to deny the organization from them – It’s good for them.

DanTheMan

When I stumbled upon freeminds and other such sites, and the scales fell from my eyes, of course that was a wonderful and exhilarating feeling - knowing that I was justified for my having come to hate the religion that I had once so naively embraced. I wasn't the problem!

But then reality hits - life in this world is painful and uncertain. And JWism fosters such an extreme dependence that we find life on the outside to be overwhelming, and we start longing for the comfortable confines of the high-structure, high-control, no-need-to-think-for-ourselves JW life. In many ways I functioned better in that environment. I don't ever think about going back, the very thought is ridiculous, but it really is true that in some ways I was better off JW. I hope that isn't always true.

SheilaM

GOF: One thing Thunde has taught me because I am naive much of the time. That MEN ARE PIGS that is all cultures, religions etc. There are a few men out there but you just have to find one, like Lyin, Calamity, Cruzan and I did (sorry if I left anyone out)

I am sorry you were hurt if you wish to PM I can talk to you more personally about what happened but suffice to say been there been hurt and it was not by a dub.

Please don't feel that is indicative of "the world" it is just LIFE and sometimes men suck.

( I hearby apologize to any man I offend by this)

Lady Lee

Girl

You aren't helping him or his new family if you are still talking to him about the baby or anything else and you certainly aren't helping yourself. Time to move forward from all oof it and find a life you can feel good about and friends you can trust.

The JWs taught us to be afraid of everything. There are some really great folks out here in the world. Keep looking and don't let anyone put you down for your choices

There is no such thing as a mistake only learning experiences

So learn from this and move forward

jgnat

I told him that would never happen and not to call me unless it was to let me know how everything was going with the baby.

Smart girl! We can all get conned. Some guys are pretty smart. But the smart girls walk away when they find out "prince charming" is really a toad.

gumby

If you have ever served as an elder in a congregation with MANY problems you would realize all this stuff happens within the borg quite often. All Churches encourage chastity before marraige......not only the witnesses.

So sorry for your hurt.{{{{{{ }}}}}}

Gumby

Maverick

Remember that early on in your indoctrination with the Duds they implant an exit phobia that tells you that if you ever leave all manner of bad things will happen to you, it is Gods punishment and in the end God will kill you! They install this carefully and this bulls--t will reek havco with your getting out. Do some exit counselling as was suggested. Maverick

Francois

And try to remember, too, that many women aren't worth the cost of a bullet to blow them to kingdom come. I know, I've been with a few of them. Men are no worse than women on average. Sad, but true. Men have a tendency to put women up on pedestals, and that manifestly is not where they belong...far from it.

francois

Austrian

Take confort Girlonthefence it took me a couple of years after leaving before the Armageddon nightmares stopped completely. The thing that help me most was associating with ex-jdubs and talking about all the crap we were brainwashed with.

asleif_dufansdottir

.. but, he still calls almost every week (and it's not to talk about the baby).

There's a way to put a screeching halt on that...tell him, the next time he calls, that you've decided to try to get reinstated...and you are going to the elders to confess to everything, with the tapes of all the latest times when he's called you (then hang up before he tries to talk you out of it)

Even better. Wait til you've actually taped the conversations a few times (making sure you don't say anything damning yourself) and do take them to the elders (don't try to be reinstated though, that's bogus)

Liz...of the "the Hell I wouldn't" class

"...maybe I shouldn't have left"

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