Would You Go To A Memorial Service For A JW )if you were no longer attending the KH)?

by minimus 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sour Grapes
    Sour Grapes

    I don't think that I would go. I have a couple of dear friends that I haven't talked to for well over a year when I stopped going to the meetings cold turkey. They called me on the phone and left voicemails asking me to call back so they could encourage me and read some scriptures together. That just turned me off. These guys can't be just friends, they have to be praying or reading the Bible or pleading to come back to the meetings.

    The last time I bumped into an elder while visiting a friend in the hospital, he told me that he knows that an angel directed him to be at the hospital the same time I was there so he could encourage me. When he saw me he shook my hand, gave me a hug and in two minutes his iPhone was out and he was reading the Bible to me.

    I know if I went to a funeral I would be preached to. I wasted 60 years of my life being a JW.

    Sour Grapes

  • kairos

    I actually quit attending memorials at the KH several years before my exit.

    They really frown upon crying and emotion.
    As if it is 'wrong'.
    I need to mourn in a natural, healthy way that may include crying.


    Can you even imagine this scenario:

    My JW wife dies and I agree to go to her memorial.
    She's well loved, so it would be a full house.

    Me, admitted apostate, what? When do i come in? Late. Sit in the back?
    Would they even mention me in the talk?
    Would anyone acknowledge me on any level?

    After years of shunning, could anyone not see the hypocrisy?

    I'll stand out front with my own makeshift memorial and simple message for all to read as they drive in:

    'You used to love me'

  • Done

    No. I will pay my respects in my own way, not at a KH

  • Moster


  • DesirousOfChange

    Yes, we have attended some JW memorial services (they never have "funerals") at the Kingdumb Hall. We go if we think it will add meaning for those we care about in their family, or even if we think we need to show our respect for the deceased.

    We especially go (kingdom hall, funeral home, or whatever) to those "lesser ones" that we know will not have support of the Congregation. Two funerals we recently attended were not at the KH because the Eldubs would not allow it. One was an inactive witness in good-standing with the rest of the family all devout, long-time JWs. There was not even a local Eldub who would perform the service although the same BOE arranged for an elder to do the service of an unbelieving mate of another sister within the same 30 day period. WTF is wrong with these self-righteous, supercilious assholes? Would you want to bet that it had "nothing" to do with the difference of contributions they saw going into the box?

  • minimus

    Being around a lot of JWs gives me angst

  • Butyoucanneverleave

    I said that I would never step foot inside a Kingdom Hall. But I just recently attended a funeral service for a family friend. I felt extremely out of place but I was paying my respects to the family. They looked up scriptures on their phones and played a song with words about the resurrection at the end that appeared on 2 giant screens. I haven't been to a KH in years. It was very "1984".

  • minimus

    Weird 👹

  • freddo

    Anecdotal report from a PIMO who attended a JW memorial service last weekend at a KH in England on a Saturday afternoon.

    Divorcee in her 70's died between Xmas and New year. No family in jw's. She became a Jw in about 1980. Health problems and then pretty much housebound last few years. Regular listener on the phone link. Would get visited by elders with the CO from time to time.

    Congregation about 75 - guess how many from her congregation turned up to the JW memorial service?

    My source tells me she counted 29 present OF WHICH only 17 were from the dead sister's congregation.

    10 others were mainly over 70's from the congregations (2) that share the kingdom hall. 1 she didn't recognise at all and even 1 DF'd chap turned up that had gone years ago!

    She said the only elders (out of a possible 9) that turned up were the old boy taking it (78) and the old boy who said the prayer (81).

    What a friggin' memorial for nearly 40 years service to the "one true god!"

  • nonjwspouse

    My father in law left as an elder in the early 80s, does not even attend the yearly memorials, will go to a JW service for someone who has died that he knew

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