The X-Mas thing...
Punk, get your granddaughter a Christmas present! Make new memories with her.
I didn't have a Christmas childhood either, but now we all dive in. Theres a Manhattan of Christmas presents in the living room, I can't wait to watch everyone open them in 3 mornings. I love all aspects of Christmas.
One thing tho..I remember being very young and listening for reindeer on the roof...i was hoping there was a Santa even if my parents didn't believe in him...and maybe he would still stop at our house and surprise everyone.
It's whatever you want it to be punky. Personally I've just finished work for six days and I'm doin' nowt for six days, I'm absolutely shattered. So I'm going to read and watch telly. Wonderful! I'm making a roast dinner on Xmas day because we like roasties and pud. My daughter's a vegetarian so we're having goats cheese tart with it. Nobody's coming round which suits me, feet up, large glass of wine or three. Had four meals out with friends and relatives this month, it was fun. Do whatever you want to punky, that's the great thing you can choose now!
I can relate. Having grown up without the tradition of xmas, it really doesn't mean anything to me, even after leaving the JWs and living without their influence.
I don't have anything against xmas, or how people get excited about it. I get invited to xmas parties, and I go, and enjoy them. I've received gifts, and even given a few to a select few people, who I felt moved to give something to. I like some xmas songs, especially the classics and a few of the ones popular during my youth (Lennon, Springsteen, Greg Lake, etc).
But the so called 'xmas spirit' or 'joy' isn't there. It doesn't exist for me. I can't get excited about it, or care enough about it to drive to the mall in xmas traffic (the single worst thing about xmas - traffic). I have no sentimentality about any of it. At my most cynical, it's just a marketing ploy to sell shit. At my least cynical, it's just a day off work, maybe visiting friends or going on a trip, or maybe just a movie. (that used to be my thing, go to the movies on xmas. But now they release blockbusters on xmas weekend and it's too damn crowded)
I admit that I also don't get the "Christmas Spirit". I really never missed it much even as a JW kid. My folks really did see to it that I didn't "miss out" on anything. We shopped the "after Christmas sales".
As an adult who clearly understands TTATT now, I just don't have any desire to jump in head first to the over-commercialization of Christmas. I give a token "thank you gift" to important business contacts because it's kinda expected.
I have no desire to rock the boat on our fade and put up a tree or lights, etc. I try to avoid the Malls completely in December.
Doc a Humbug
I hear you! Just another day and a month long heinous song build up that I must be subjected to at the supermarket.
PS thanks (not) for putting that "other" long since forgotten song in mine.
I find it hard to get into gift giving at xmas, especially to my kids. People asking if I have done my xmas shopping. Sometimes easier to just say yes.
I cannot recall what we ever did around xmas. Not a lot.
So I feel and hear you and "get" it. Having an xmas bbq with beers at the beach and a couple of non jw friends this year. Have a good one whatever you do.
Mary J Grinch
Christmas is awesome!! Beautiful!!
there isn't anything wrong about "Christmas means nothing to me"...that is a place of neutrality. Judging from what you have said though you aren't neutral. You don't like the songs, tv movies where people are (gasp!!) dressed in red. I suspect that you harbour the same feelings about Christmas now that you did as a JW and those feelings come from a place of misery. I think it is important (because you don't WANT to resent other peoples happiness) that you make an effort to get out and have a share of simple, honest, good cheer. Embrace it...and spread it. Ya don't even have to mention Christmas just smile, nod...say "greetings"...for goodness sake...you're NO LONGER a hostage...open the windows wide, beloved.
I feel similar. I didn't grow up with it so it doesn't feel part of my culture. I celebrate with the people I work with and fit my children but I completely understand when you say it doesn't mean anything to you.
I can understand not feeling excited by a holiday you never were a part of. There is nothing wrong with that, but there is something to be said for making something special out of one day a year. It's a way to mark the passage of a year, to connect with loved ones, to slow down, to do something a little different. Things become special because you make them so, so create your own holiday traditions. It doesn't have to be anything everyone else does. It could be going to the movies, or having friends over for chili. We find ourselves without family around this year, so my husband invited some people over for a tri-tip bar-b-que. Not very traditional, but who cares, he didn't feel like ham or turkey.
I made a late minute decision to send cards this year, as I do paper crafting I even made them all by hand. As I was addressing them I realised that if I hadn't done this I don't know when I would have contacted some of my family, the date pushed me to make that connection, I was glad I did. I hate malls too, so I don't go there. I buy gifts throughout the year, stash them away and hopefully don't forget where they are, lol.
It's not just me !
Happy joyful people just make me want to punch them in the face (bah humbug, LOL)
I hate hate hate gift cards with a passion (way overpriced sentimental crap). Wrapping something up just to rip it open the next day? May as well rip banknotes up. Putting xmas lights up when it's snow and ice? I may as well jump off a wall and break my neck that way (have I missed anything? probably ...)
I do like the turkey dinner though ... mmnn, stuffing, sprouts and yorkshire pudding, carrots and swede (rutabager when you're looking for it over here)