Uninvited...again...

by Anders Andersen 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • stuckinarut2
    stuckinarut2

    Wow!

    Sorry to hear.

    This just proves how rampant gossip and slanderous talk is amongst witnesses!

    They will just revel in the opportunity to speak in a derogatory way about any who no longer attend meetings!

    Oh, but this isn't a cult of course.....

  • jp1692
    jp1692

    Inviting and then uninviting. What's wrong with these people? Oh, I know: they are in a high-control, authoritarian cult and are afraid to think and act for themselves.

    Cowards.

  • Anders Andersen
    Anders Andersen

    @Giles Gray:

    Yes, I would have gladly attended. I'm not afraid of nor angry with any individual JW. Even if (and this is purely hypothetical) I would have come to understand that me attending would be a starting point to DF me, I would have gone. JW rules do not apply to me and I will not have my decisions influenced by their bullshit manipulation and abuse.

    Other never-JW people will be at the party too. Apparently they are much better company than I am :-D

    @tiki

    The host explained he wants a happy party without any tensions. He simply doesn't want to deal with JW staring me down, complaining or leaving upset. That wouldn't be much of a party. So he chose to be egoistic (his words) and sacrifice me instead of multiple others. He just doesn't want to take a stand for the principles involved. He simply wants to throw a party. At least he's honest and decent about it. And after all, it's his party and he can invite and uninvite anyone he likes...

    But it's sad that some/many JW can't even stand to be in the same room as someone who no longer believes as they do. Petty, narrow minded, and terrified wimps.

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    ANDERS ANDERSEN:

    I have a theory about these invitations by Witnesses that end up being withdrawn.

    I feel it is a charade done deliberately so as to make you feel "shunned" (after all, shunning does not work without an audience. The audience is YOU).

    They already know you're out and they hope this "rejection" and Indian giving of an insincere invitation is going to make you want to go running back to the religion.

    Take the money you would have spent and do something enjoyable. Forget about these Witnesses and their games.

  • cha ching
    cha ching

    Dear AA... I think that this has become a tactic of "the Borg."

    A similar control tactic happened at three weddings that we (my husband, and I, my adult son and his wife) have been invited to.

    I don't even know how the elders found out about these things... but they did, and they did their dirty work.

    People were told "if ex-elder gives the talk, and you go, it won't be good for you".... or "if you go to that gathering, and "they" are there......

    We were not uninvited to the weddings, but people did not show up. I guess the moral people here were the ones "on the way out" who had the decency to show respect for real friendship.

  • Giles Gray
    Giles Gray

    AA:- "I would have gone. JW rules do not apply to me and I will not have my decisions influenced by their bullshit manipulation and abuse."

    No wonder you were not invited. With that kind of attitude... It's just not cricket!

    AA:- " Other never-JW people will be at the party too. Apparently they are much better company than I am"

    Their loss is our gain. Spoilsports.

    Hope those points you made open your wife's mind just a little.

  • Esse quam videri
    Esse quam videri

    With that debacle in mind, I wasn't surprised to receive a message from my friend 'Hey are you at home? We need to discuss you being at my anniversary party'. Well what do you know! Yesterday he told me I'm not invited anymore as the congregation was getting upset about me being there.

    I'm stunned that an adult would put up with crap like that. You need a backbone.

  • ToesUp
    ToesUp
    What a pathetic tactic. I truly believe it is done on purpose. To hurt those who have left. The JW way! No one invites us anywhere. We are off the radar. Thank God!
  • Gorbatchov
    Gorbatchov

    @Anders, it's a sect with narrow minded people. Before waking up I was just like them... Didn't you? It's not fear, but we can expect this.

    Remembering starting fading we were not invited also. It feels suck... and respectless.

    G.

  • freddo
    freddo

    *Your experience may differ

    However - round our way when this sort of thing rarely arose the elder on the body with lots of opinions and usually with his family all in will make waves about successful faders and waffle on about what the GB really want us to do even if it's not in print. (roll eyes).

    If there are enough of them they will lean on the party giver or the party giver will be so conditioned that they will ask the advice of the elders either before or after inviting a fader.

    When there is a "conscience decision" to be made - they (most JW elders) are a bunch of tight-knickered assholes looking to maintain control to look good in the eyes of the CO or Branch. Nothing to see here ...

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