I'm glad you posted this and let us bat it around a little bit. Sometimes people come at us from an unexpected angle on these issues.
Your DIL said:
So many of you are still so bitter and angry, and have lost your faith in anything
I don't know you Mulan, but you don't come across as "bitter and angry" to me. Has your DIL been reading this or other ex-JW boards? How does she come to this conclusion, since it's not in your or your husband's nature to display bitterness or anger? I just have to smile when someone who doesn't understand the nature of what we've been through (especially people like you, Marilyn, who were inside this high-control group for 46 years) tell us how we should behave. I would have guessed she was "Christian" even before you telling me, based on her comment. I don't hold it against her since I don't know her, but I just wonder where this she gets this info that we are "bitter and angry".
Then sameolme said within one post:
I have been reading this board for a few years. <snip>…. May I suggest that you, quit posting and reading for awhile. Go out and explore the real world, without the safety cloak of this board.
This board has only been here three years. Anyhow -- what makes sameolme suggest that someone else should get off the board, while he/she can stay on? This kind of directing of what others should or shouldn't do is paternalistic and JW-like, in my opinion. Mulan (as far as I am able to tell from reading this board) does have a real life outside this board. To suggest to us that we're somehow using this board as a crutch or a hiding place from reality is insulting.
This board helps us get through the very serious issues of having been a JW (along with some of the funnier issues like silly kingdom songs), and as such when we can express these things and hear the affirmation from others that indeed, our experience inside the JW's was not unique, HELPS us as we try to decompress from the experience and share in life in "the real world".
Everybody decompresses at their own rate. I just hate being told by people who "know better" when is the right time to "move on". That's a decision for each member of this board to make (or not make).