I feel so stuck. I am married to a wonderful man. I have been married for almost a decade and adore my husband. We are both witnesses. He is devout. Any issues that come up, he sits down and prays with me, finds answers in the bible and is mild in his approach. We talk everything through.
we both grew up as witnesses. My husband in a strict JW family. Mine were not so strict. I started pioneering at 20 years old and was a textbook nice spiritual young sister. We met in our mid 20s and married after a couple of years.
i started having doubts in my late 20s. I would try to ignore the doubts and tried to pray for spirituality and help on overcoming my doubts. I have felt bored at meetings and conventions/assemblies for years. At our most recent I didn't take any notes and barely clapped. My husband knows I'm struggling with my belief in a god. He is very kind and understanding.
I have no time for angry anti-JW comments. JWs are kind people. It's more that I don't believe it's the truth. I feel stuck in this life. I can leave my friends and ones I know. But It will break my heart disappointing my husband. I feel like I signed up to support him spiritually. I am one of the lucky ones in life having found love, but it's at a cost. I'm not being true to myself.
i feel depressed and like I am being fake in life. My husband is visiting family overseas right now. I'm taking it as a holiday from meetings. Will call in sick for the talk I'm meant to give this week.
if I slow fade it will take me years. Has anyone else had to deal with this? Or are in my situation?