If The Jehovah's Witnesses Stole Your Past...Don't Let Them Steal Your Future!

by The Bethelite 14 Replies latest jw friends

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  The Bethelite

  Yes, many here have lost many years of life due to being infected by this cult like religion. For many it is very hard to let go of that life and those wasted years.

  Of course people need time to heal and this web site is a great place to do that, swap war stories and commiserate.

  I was in for over 50 years. So of course it will be with me for the rest of my life. My son was in for 21 years and we both left it 19 years ago.

  However like thousands of other people my son can't let it go. Each day is consumed with what "the Witnesses did to him." All the missed opportunities, education, school sports, childhood friends... this has been going on for 19 years.

  So in essence the church stole his first 21 years and his last 19 years also.

  So how many more years will they steal from him and others?

  I told him he needs to make peace with this, so he can still enjoy his future.

  So please my friends don't let the Watchtower Bible & Truck Society steal any more of your future.

  Keith Casarona
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  mynameislame

  Yup, I left at 30 or so and the truth of the matter is you don't really know what you missed. But you do know what you are longing for so make those your goals.
  
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  Biahi

  Watch Lloyd Evans new video about religious trauma syndrome. It’s very good. (((Hugs to you and your son))). Btw, I’m coming to AZ March 21 st. Would love to meet up or go on one of your tours.
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  solomon

  It’s hard to move on from any kind of abusive relationship. I was a jw victim just like most who have joined this forum. The only way I was able to come to terms with it was to focus on the positives and the lessons I learned from being a jw. The fact that I was finally able to wake up from the nightmare is a great accomplishment that needs to be celebrated.

  I think leaving any abusive relationship is a grieving process. We had so much invested but lost so much. A person has to come to terms or it will eat them up inside and out.
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  was a new boy

  Has he allowed himself to get therapy?

  
  

  Religious Trauma Syndrome. RTS is not yet officially recognized in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.

  
  

  https://www.therefuge-ahealingplace.com/ptsd-treatment/religious/

  
  

  Treatment approaches for religious trauma may include:
  

  Interpersonal therapy (IPT):

  Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT):

  Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT):

  Intensive family therapy and Family Week:
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  Longlivetherenegades

  We normally view with repugnance persons who induce others of limited resources to invest in ventures based purely on speculative grounds and which result in devastating financial loss. But there are things even more important, more valuable, and certainly more irreplaceable than money. Our time—the hours, days, months and years it involves—is the “currency” of life itself. Those resources are limited. We would perhaps do well to realize that, even if we live to pass 80 years of age, at birth we only had a fund of about 30,000 days at our disposal At 40, half those 30,000 days are already spent; by the time we are 50, only 11,000 days are still in the fund; at 60, about 7,000 days, and our life “bank account” dwindles dramatically thereafter.

  By the same token, while we may be grateful for the thoughts, experience and relative wisdom of others, we can never afford to allow anyone to assume control of our time, in effect dictating the use of the limited funds of our life. We may have done this in the past, and the natural tendency is to resist acknowledging that in doing so we have made a poor investment. To recognize and admit to oneself that years, even decades, have been spent in pursuing an illusionary path is painful. The pain of even contemplating that possibility maybe so strong that we prefer to refuse to consider it, to shut out the hard facts and continue on as we have been doing. But we cannot salvage the investment by “pouring good money after bad.”

  ISoCF by Ray Franz........ page 628

  We got to move on.
  
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  Rivergang

  Well said!
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  LongHairGal

  LONGLIVETHERENEGADES:

  You said it correctly that our Time is the currency of life itself! And, we have a limited amount of it.

  Every person on the forum has invested a different amount of time in the religion. Myself, I was not born in but came in as a young working adult. I wasted about twenty+ years there (even if I was on the fringes) and am Out that amount of time. Many others were born-in and/or spent more time there. The longer somebody is in the harder it is for them.

  While I am angry about failed prophecies and the deception which got me in, I am more angry about how I was treated.. Even though what I experienced personally can never be forgiven in my book (and I would never again subject myself to this treatment anywhere).. I do believe we have to move on.

  We all have a New Year in which to work on it.
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  Sherman

  Good point The Bethelite
  

  I think its beneficial to expand your intellect through education where you take in and comprehend knowledgeable information and understanding on your own terms.

  The one great thing we have today is the internet and all the research and acquired knowledge obtainable by using it.

  Even researching JWS's doctrines.

  Getting yourself involved in community sport activities is another way to learn and be apart of something social.

  Learn a new hobby

  Get acquainted with your local library.
  
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  Simon

  The only way I was able to come to terms with it was to focus on the positives and the lessons I learned from being a jw.

  This is a key thing. Sure, you can wallow in self-pity and things you didn't get or have, but then you also benefited from some of the upbringing as well although many find it harder to imagine that worst things could have befallen them.

  Looking backwards is allowing them to rob more of your life. Better to forget, even forgive, and move on. Focus on what you can do for yourself now, and for others around you, and not what someone else did to you which may have been with the best of intentions.