I feel really, really sorry for those born into the Jehovah's Witness religion

by jambon1 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • jambon1

    Some facts that make the difference between you and me:

    1 - as a person raised by non JW family, my parents have never loved me based on conditions set out by a group of old men who they don't even know. How does it feel to know that you are in the unique situation where your parents brought you into the world and said 'I'll show love to you. But, only if you believe the same things as me. Otherwise I will view you as dead'. Absolutely crazy.

    2 - my parents never taught me the deep seated, harmful & divisive concept that EVERYONE who doesn't believe what we believe is worthy of death, and a horrific one at that - strewn as manure over the surface of the earth! This has got to be deeply harmful to the mind of a child.

    3 - my parents provided me with a diverse and socially interesting background of people who would later go on to provide me with superb, non judgmental, life long friendships. If you state that you believe differently from friends, you lose your entire social network in an instant. How sad.

    4 - my parents never taught me bedtime stories about babies being cut in half, people being drowned in a worldwide flood or an imminent impending death for all humanity. Again, the psychological impact of this must have been horrendous.

    5 - my parents never put the responsibilities of an adult onto myself as a young child. Expecting your child to make a stand for something they dont have a full grasp of, at school, is utterly mind boggling to me. Forcing your child to continually stand out as different among big groups of their peers is selfish and inconsiderate of the child's feelings.

    6 - on a Saturday morning I watched cartoons.

    All in all, parents who raise their children as witnesses are in my opinion, self absorbed, inconsiderate and in the case of implementing shunning, outright wicked.

    i left the religion behind because I could see the glaring harm that a JW upbringing would do to my children. The psychological impact must be significant. Those that remain must be completely blind to the potential harm.

    I wish more parents would wake up before it's too late.

  • fukitol

    Thank you for your very insightful opening post and for starting this thread.

    I am a born-in and can relate personally and deeply to everything you say. It was like reading about my own childhood.

  • Xanthippe

    Yes I agree it is very damaging to children. The basic idea that your parents don't love you just for being their child does lasting harm. I would do anything for my daughter, she knows this. She has grown up stronger than I did because of it.

    The judgemental way we are taught to look at other people is also harmful. It stops you seeing individuals with all their good, bad, interesting and quirky qualities.

    People are fun, sometimes they drive you crazy but generally when the chips are down, most people you know would be there for you. They aren't a faceless mass of bad people who deserve to die.

    I just want to add it's taken me a ridiculously long time to understand people because of my JW upbringing. I'm inclined to give up on people because of my childhood beliefs. Also because my family are like brick walls, there's no getting through to them, I tend to see other people like that.

    I think that's it, that's the end of the friendship because we had a slight falling out. However if I try again they are fine! They've either forgotten all about it or they want me to forgive them! Who knew friends could be like this! I'm still learning, my daughter learned all this at primary school because she was allowed to have friends. It's taken me so long. Better late than never.

  • Still Totally ADD
    Still Totally ADD

    As a born-in well said jambon 1. You hit the nail right on the head. Still Totally ADD

  • Landy

    ...outright wicked.

    That's a bit OTT - there are members of religions in the world that treat their kids wickedly if they don't conform but JWs aren't included in that. Misguided and easlily led yes, wicked no.

  • notsurewheretogo

    As a convert at 19 I adored my normal childhood...some great points Jambon1.

  • Vanderhoven7


  • William Penwell
    William Penwell

    I agree that if I was to raise children now I would not raise them in any religious faith based system. I do not hold any animosity toward my parents as they did not know what they were doing and they did the best they could raising me. I hold the animosity toward the religion itself.

  • Vidiot

    It took me a long time to realize that a born-in never really gets the opportunity to truly become a "whole" person.

  • WingCommander

    Growing up a JW was totally F*cked!! I had to be a "mini-adult" and a "representative of the Truth", 24/7, and at school as well.

    Geees, don't get me started!

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