by jdash 11 Replies latest jw experiences

  • jdash

    So this morning I had a conversation with my grandmother about going out in service. Remind you I'm only 17. I tried to ask her why I had to go out in service if this isn't what I believe in and whatnot. She went on saying basically these are the rules for this house. I bought up being a fake witness, because why should I go preach and go knock on people's door telling them to believe this and that when I, myself don't believe in them. I didn't give specific reasons on why I don't so she used that saying stuff like "you haven't done the research and studying to believe this isn't the truth" something along that line. I wanted to bring some research I have done, but then she would've brought up going to apostate sites and whatnot. She said I was confused and I was just being a teenager.

    So it ended and of course, because I'm still a minor and I'm forced, I went out in service.

    She tried to use an example on me. She said " if you moved out here, which one of your friends house could you stay with until you're 21?" I didn't answer, because she didn't let me. Then she said, "If one of your friends needed a place to stay, we would let him until he can be on his own" or something like that. "That's because we are Jehovah's Witnesses and we are loving and caring." I wanted to say so many things about that but I didn't.

  • St George of England
    St George of England

    The most important thing for you right now is to work towards financial independence.

    Hopefully you are still in school or education or some form of training. Whatever, keep you head down, don't argue and if it means a bit of door knocking to keep the peace so be it. Work towards that goal. Without financial independence you're stuck!


  • DesirousOfChange

    You won't want to hear this, but at 17 your best move is to STFU and go in service this morning and just continue to "fake it" until you are prepared to go it on your own. It's a cruel world, buddy, and I wouldn't want to be 17, close to broke, without a good job, and no place to live, and with little hope of achieving any real goals I dreamed of for the future.

    There is also the old adage to hire a teenager while they're cheap and while they still know everything. It was amazing to me how much smarter my dad got in the ten years from when I was 15 to 25. IOW, you're still young and have most all of your life ahead of you and you're attitudes and opinions will likely change a lot in the course of time. Don't make any decisions now that you'll greatly regret later (or worse, regret forever).

    Good luck!


  • stan livedeath
    stan livedeath

    alwys have a return visit lined up. ( used to be " back calls "in my day ). most elders have them. just an excuse to eff off early. for a return visit just memorise a house where theres usually no one home.

    no one checks the service reports you hand in. have a bible study with one of your mates. you can always study beer and girls.

  • Giordano

    Think of FS & a meeting or two as the rent you pay to live under their roof and as payment for the food you eat.

    An after school job and a full Saturday job limits field service.

    When you buy a car you might be able to get on your Grandparent's policy which would lower the premium.

    While you are mentally out of the religion your still physically in it for now......... 'rules of the house'.

    If you act out in inappropriate ways......... Your Elder grandfather could be asked to resign his position because you live with him. If this is a big deal to him, his being an Elder you have to make sure you don't compromise him.

  • dubstepped

    So I know a lady in her 60's (I think) that is an atheist that still goes door to door. She's in too deep to leave. I asked her how she goes in service. She tries to go to doors by herself (not always possible) and either does the old air knock where she pretends to knock or ring. If she is with someone or stumbles upon a person at home she simply has a prepared scripture that has a nice secular message and reads it to the person and says she's just giving people a positive thought for the day and leaves. She isn't placing literature, just sharing a nice thought, telling them to have a great day, and moving on. No damage done.

  • OnTheWayOut

    I agree with Dubstepped about faking it as much as possible and sharing just a positive thought with people.
    You can win a battle with Grandma, but lose the war of being able to ride it out until you are independent if you want to argue over recruitment.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    You did well by not telling her what you know. It is way better to keep your opinions to yourself and just ask a very occasional question, in such a way that she feels obligated to answer it, then very calmly and without being confrontational, make her explain any dishonesty she uses to weasel her way out of properly answering that question. Keep focussed on making her answer the question that you asked so that she can't morph it into some other question that she is more comfortable with.

    Take it easy, softly, softly catchee monkey.

  • never a jw
    never a jw

    Hey! you already got good advice. Let me add one more. I have heard time and time again in this forum that one of the few things of having been a witness is that one acquires skill and confidence when speaking in public. Turn this heavy burden of being a fake JW into an opportunity to develop a skill that will serve you well for a lifetime. We know the JW stuff is all bullshit, but you can tone it down and put to practice your public speaking skills and the art of persuasion with total strangers, even attempt to influence them. This type of skill, if mastered, is worth the BIG bucks.

  • The Fall Guy
    The Fall Guy

    jdash - As others have advised you, bite your tongue. You are not in a good position at the moment to teach any JW about TTATT, but don't worry, you will have tons of time and opportunity to do so in the coming years.

    Ride out the next few months until you are no longer a minor, then fade rapidly - stating "private & personal" reasons. Best wishes.

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