I've been reading many of the postings on this forum for a couplefew years, finally joined today. I think reading Cappytan, and others like that, compelled me to share, it seems I might have a bit of a different outcome than many I have read, perhaps it will be hopeful/helpful to someone.
I was a born-in, 3rd gen JW, my entire family (parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and most all of my childhood friends) were in. Some dropped by the wayside as the years went on, but many stayed in, and if they didn't, they still acted/talked as if they believed it was "the truth" and it was their weaknesses/failings that made them stop attending. I was disfellowshipped when I was in my late-twenties (how that happened is quite an amazing story which I could go into if anyone was interested, but not the main reason I am writing). Over night, as so many of you painfully and deeply understand, I lost all of my family and childhood friends, including those not attending, because as you all also painfully know, they were under threat if they continued to associate with me, and they didn't want to lose our family.
That was all 30 years ago. I was shattered, completely broken, and had to put myself back together, by myself. I tell friends now that I did manage to do it, but after glue-ing myself back together I was left with a bit of a limp. To say I ended up going out "into the world" would be an understatement (what did I have to lose?). Let's just say, there wasn't much I didn't end up trying, and even sticking with alot. But again, that's not why I'm writing. My main purpose is to give hope to those who still believe in God, and Jesus, and the Bible, despite what they've been through. I threw the baby out with the bathwater and had nothing to do with anything for three decades. I was so indoctrinated that I couldn't even imagine having a different understanding of the Bible than what I had been taught, or a different relationship with God than what I saw around me growing up, which wasn't much for most of them. But I set out on a personal journey a few years ago, and I just want to share what I've learned and how transformed my life has become.
There is hope for keeping, or finding again, your faith, and belief in God and Jesus and the Bible, completely apart from the Watchtower, and actually coming into what I never felt I had in the JW's: a real relationship with God. I believe it's like Jesus said it would be, there are wheat and tares all mixed up together in the field, that includes individual congregations, and denominations. There is no perfect church, or perfect and total understandings of all subjects. But we can actually have that peace Jesus promised, and hope, and rest that God holds out to us. When I decided that they did not have the right to estrange me from God and I had allowed that to happen, which I don't blame myself for, considering everything, I set out to find a group to worship and study and support and encourage each other in.
First I had to go through a complete unindoctrination of everything I had known and believed, which was astonishingly difficult, but which I did by diving into the Bible and the Bible alone, when I had questions I turned to various commentaries and teachers but didn't assume anyone was "the right one", I just tried to stay open to what others had learned and decide for myself with prayer. I currently attend a Calvary Chapel here in California, all we use is the Bible, it is a small fellowship, with imperfect people but loving and devoted. I've learned that God keeps his promises, if we turn to Him with all our heart we will find Him. I will go wherever He leads me, and although I do think the Witnesses are correct about some things, as are the other denominations, so far it is further and further away from the Watchtower, the more I just study and rely on His word.
I know there are many folks on this forum who do not believe, and do a bit of scoffing, I am not really addressing them. I just wanted to write to those who do still believe, but have absolutely no idea what to do, especially those who were born-in and haven't known anything else. So many things we were told are not true. It was surprisingly frightening when I began going to churches to check them out. But I'm so, so glad I went and retrieved the "baby" and have a fellowship where I attend, where the arrogance and judgementalness of the JW's is not to be found.
I don't necessarily agree with everything taught there, but what a welcome change it is to be able to bring those things up and everyone still loves and welcomes you. So, dear ones who have been so very hurt by that organization (not organism, like a body, like we should be), by their family who shun them, by people you thought were friends, by men who lord it over your faith just as Jesus said not to, I know well your pain, but there is hope. I pray you don't throw that baby out with the bathwater like I did for so long. Take it all to God in heartfelt prayer, read His word and do your best to understand it, call on Jesus as our Lord to guide us, and pray for the Jehovah's Witnesses that their eyes will be opened to all the scriptures they ignore. And like David said in a psalm, even if my mother and father turn against me, I have a heavenly father.