It baffles me why they would even say this

by Tameria2001 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • ToesUp

    This sounds VERY familiar. We to have been told similar things.

    They are too old to do anything different. It scares them to even contemplate leaving the borg. It is ALL they know. It is like the movie the Truman show.

    If your family wants to continue to believe this, even if it is not true, so be it. If they choose not to associate with you or your family, it is their great loss. As much as it hurts, it is their choice and we may not understand why but we have to go along with it or it will drive us nuts thinking about it. This is what we have decided to do. When we are with our still in family, it really is just small talk and casual conversation. When WT subjects come up we just sit there and smile and keep quiet. It is just too frustrating going head to head with them. They all know how we feel about WT and we will not continue to argue with them.

    WT is their comfort zone. Their warm blanket. It makes them feel safe, warm and cozy. If they left that comfort zone and went and lived in the real world, I just don't think they can handle it. WT tells them how to feel, think and live. Doing anything without WT is scary. It is a VERY sad way to live.

  • Phizzy

    J.W's actually do not care about truth, if they did they would be devastated when there is a Doctrinal change, " What ? I've been teaching error all this time ?, I told my Students it was the Truth !"

    They don't feel like that, they swallow the New Light B.S , and they do not care !

    J.W's are only J.W's because of several emotional connections, based on Fear, truth does not enter in to it.

  • sparky1

    "Sunk Cost." They have so much 'invested' in the religion that they feel they cannot leave. Like compulsive gamblers they 'stay in the game' because at any moment they feel the 'big score' (Armageddon and the new system) will finally come their way.

  • Vidiot

    I remember thinking about this when I first started seriously pondering the idea of leaving.

    I think I was quite a bit luckier than most...

    ...when I really looked, I couldn't actually identify a whole lot of personal mental and emotional investment in my membership (besides my mother).

  • ShirleyW

    They say that because they're fully indoctrinated, they drank the "mental koolaid" no matter how much new light and flip flops the borg puts out, they just eat it up without thought. Just like the folks who turn out for Trump's rallies, whatever he says, they just eat it up.

    Like I said a few weeks ago here, if Trump and the Borg said that from now on 2+2=5, they would totally believe it.

  • pepperheart

    Well if the jws need a warm blanket etc these next few years they are going to have a nasty shock these next few years as they start selling more and more kingdom halls off

  • steve2

    When you’ve given up so much for your religion and invested so much in promoting it, you will be less inclined to subsequently critically appraise it and walk away from it = sunk cost fallacy.

    Oh, it’s also the reason many bad marriages do not result in divorce or separation and why people stay in jobs they hate.

  • the girl next door
    the girl next door

    In my mid twenties, a girl I had gone to high school with contacted me and asked me if I would study with her because she wanted to become one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. She was raised in a Presbyterian family and we had discussed religion just a handful of times in school. We were not particularly close. Acquaintances more than friendly.

    At first I thought it was a joke. She was serious. Then I struggled with myself. I didn’t really want to hassle with a “ bible study” and I felt guilty because, after all, isn’t that the end all be all of existence as a JW?

    I even tried to push her off onto other sisters. While I had pioneered in my teens, I was happy at this point in my life to put in my 2 or 3 hours a month, which was bullshit but it kept the secretary and my conductor off my ass. My Asshole(now ex-husband) was not an issue. He never went to meetings and lied on his service report as well.

    Long story short, I ended up doing the study. After the 5th or 6th study, she asked me, “What if you discovered that everything you have been taught is a lie?” (I thought she was projecting her own experience)

    I responded, “I don’t think that is possible, but if it did happen, I would be grateful for the life I have led because of my religion.”

    Which is a complete lie because I despised so much about things I missed out on because of the religion. I thought my answer to her was a way to make her believe it was great and following through to baptism would be in the pursuit of a better and happier life.

    Because of the questions raised in that study I couldn’t answer, my own research culminated in me starting my fade right before age 30.

    My study went on to get baptized. I felt tremendous guilt for lying to her.

    8 years after my fade I received a phone call out of the blue. It was her. She also left the JW religion and had no idea I had as well. She found out through the grapevine and contacted me.

    We talk every week. I apologized to her. To my surprise she apologized to me. The Bible study was a ruse to get baptized and marry a JW boy of which I never had a clue.

    He turned out to be a complete piece of shit so it’s another experience her and I bond over. Lmao!

    We say stupid shit to people because we want our word to assert an agenda. Even if we don’t believe the words we say in retrospect.

    The similar phrases from the opening post are probably just that. So don’t lose hope. People find the path out of WT even when they have recited the party lines for years.

  • jwundubbed

    Okay... but take a minute to take the cult out of it. These women are from the same generation of men AND women who decide to stay in loveless marriages because they made that choice, because you don't change your mind, because they have invested too much into their lives as they are.

    Times have changed. People get divorced, they change careers. But people of a certain generation and older generations aren't as flexible nor as changeable.

    I think this could be a generational thing as much as it is anything else.

  • Tameria2001

    That makes total sense, jwundubbed. My mother is still with my father even after all the bull he put her, and me through. He cheated on her a number of times, and there was at least once where the other woman confronted my mother right in front of her children. He had no issues in even trying to hide what he did. He even told his own children that he didn't love mom, and never did. I never even understood why my parents stayed together. I don't know how many kids out there felt this way, but I was one who wished mine were divorced. It was pure hell growing up in my household.

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