It baffles me why they would even say this

by Tameria2001 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Tameria2001

    Back in 2001, I left the JWs rather abruptly. I had discovered things about the Watchtower that really made me quite angry, angry because I had been lied to, and it took me just to darn long to figure it out. Before I had left, my husband and I wrote 3 letters, one to the elders at our congregation, and two to our parents. Originally we were just going to fade away, and the letters were there just in case, and the just in case happened in the form of my butt in your business brother in law.

    Two days after we sent them off, it was first a couple of elders from the congregation we had attended came by. They were just making sure that I was the one who had sent those letter, and not some imposter. I did, and they asked why, and I told them. That was that.

    Four days after I sent the letter off to my mom, she showed up; we lived about two hours away from each other. And again she too asked me why, and I told her why.

    Then she said something to me that it really baffles me why she said what she said. Also, my mother in law said this very same thing to her son as well, and both of these women said this; "Even if I discover that this is not the true religion, I will never walk away, I have invested too much of my life to ever walk away." Both of these women became JWs back in 1974, with the promise that this old system of things will pass away in the fall of 1975.

    The really sad part with this whole thing is they never got to know their grandsons because they choose to stay away. They never bonded with their own grandchildren, and now they are missing out on getting to know their great-grandson.

  • wannaexit

    Very sad!

  • The Fall Guy
    The Fall Guy

    Tameria - it's their loss, not yours or your children's. Not having a relationship with them is much better than having a toxic, conditional relationship.

    One word of caution I'd give is this - never put anything in writing to any JW's, especially elders. If they pervert what the Bible writers said, they'll pervert what you say.

  • Half banana
    Half banana

    To me it confirms that accepting the Watchtower belief system is all about getting a psychological fix.

    To believe gives hope, to see others believing the same things reinforces that hope whether it's true or not. Joining the JW religion gives you like minded friends, a safe community. Lastly it gives you an identity, you know who you are and where you stand in your group and where you stand in relation to the rest of the world-- alienated, as it happens.

    The fact that the JW religion historically has proven to be false does not mean that its aura of divine promise isn't a help for some people at a private and emotional level. Especially for those with limited education or experience of how the world works.

  • Searril

    "Even if I discover that this is not the true religion, I will never walk away, I have invested too much of my life to ever walk away."

    That's simply their, albeit inadvertent, way of admitting they are weak-minded people. They have said they would rather a comfortable lie than an uncomfortable truth. There's not much you can say to people who readily admit they want to be lied to.

    This attitude is very prevalent among the dubs.

  • WingCommander

    What your JW mothers are suffering from is what is commonly known as:

    "Head up ass syndrome."

    There is no cure. If someone is that stupid as to be presented with facts and proof, and yet STILL want to live in a state of perpetual denial, well then that is their own stupidity and not yours. There is no hope for someone like that.

  • truth_b_known

    Your story illustrates why so many Witnesses stay in even if they can see what's really going on for themselves. To them they have put too much of their lives into this religion. It's like the band on the Titanic that chose to play on even though they were sinking to their icy deaths.

    I know for certain this is why my parents are still in. My father is way too smart not to see the organization for what it is. the problem is that he is in his 70s now. That and he still believes the god of the Bible is real. Since Witnesses do such an excellent job at disproving all other religions, he feels like there is no where else to go.

  • StephaneLaliberte

    Its not about belief, its about community and being told frequently that they are better than the rest of the world.

  • tiki

    I've heard that comment as well....I think it is a mix of fear and pride....afraid to admit the waste of time and effort and feeling like a fool for being duped...deep down there a sniggling worry that it's all a sham.....but facing up to it is too hard a pill to swallow.

  • jp1692

    It’s called the “Sunk Cost Fallacy.”

    Google it.

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