I'm tired and a bit sick at the moment but I can't let anyone think that this is going to go away...
I am able to tell you a few things in order to prevent any confusion in the minds of those who are thinking that nothing will come of this ARC;that nothing will effect the WTBTS in America and other places.
I have been there and given my testimony. Helen Milroy and her assistants were there along with another group of people who are there to lend assistance if you crack up at any time during or after the hearing. I did not crack up but can see how this happens.
Security is tight and anonymity is sacred to them as they want to protect all who come forward. I think it may be too late for me as I found out I am being "researched already" by WT as of yesterday 5th January 2016. They are going right back into my childhood; calling upon childhood friends that I once knew in an attempt to gain insights into the past. This is disturbing but to be expected. I'm too determined to give in to this sort of crappy ploy.......So go ahead WT do your best, you won't win. Lie away and see what happens you rotten to the core enablers, with your slimy lawyers. The ARC is on to you. And Mr O Tool is going to suffer for his deceit.
Hours are spent in gaining information; as many hours as are required. I gave them full permission to investigate hospital records, court records, death certificates.........the lot. It turns out that one of my abusers is well known and still alive. My experience was a perfect mirror of others that they had heard. I saw a recognition in their faces as I spoke of this other man. I stopped and said......." He's still alive isn't he?" They looked at each other and complicitly agreed to let me know he is and he never stopped abusing children in the past four or five decades since me and those others who were children with me. No. He never stopped. He was only reproved for his 'sin'. He will end up in court and I'll be there along with the others......
The letter I gave them was important to them. Don't think that information is passed up by them. They are not the "society" they are a legal body of people who want to stop this sort of harm from continuing on. And they don't care what religion or group they are offending as they dig away with a persistence that I find incredibly gratifying. They are not concerned with the feelings or the power of any religion.
Mighty V8 has supported me strongly, but on the actual day I had to go alone for I couldn't bear to have any one with me. I wanted to stay focused I needed to keep my anger infront of my eyes. Not a hot anger. No. I have an ice cold anger that has kept me going.
I took no notes as I could never forget what my life had been like and how I was still fighting for validation and acceptance of the facts. My memories are vivid and etched forever like a great big white scar. I think if God exists he must be a cold white eye in the sky, casually ignoring all that has happened upon this earth.
I could not allow any form of affection. They were crying for me at one stage and this made me sad for I could not let me cry for I may never stop. I was almost brutal in delivering my experiences. I know I must have sounded harsh and deeply angry...they were wanting to hold me and I pushed them away. Amazingly they understood how damaged I was and were not offended. I wish I could be kind to them now but I was too afraid of losing the train of thought, the chronology and was re living it all.
Everything is recorded in duplicate. No one has to go into a detail that will cause danger to the soul or heart. Strangely this lack of pressure enabled me to tell it all, but I did find myself to be almost mechanical at one stage as I recounted. Almost like floating in the air......a very odd feeling.
These people are gifted in their field of work and they have my undying love. I saw the exhaustion on their faces that day, we were all worn out, too tired to give a damn if our clothing was crumpled or hair was lank..........Hard working and dedicated to the task would hardly describe my take on the work they are doing.
They are the hero's really. I don't want to allow any one to undermine them or the victims who are coming forward with such statements as ..........." Nothing will happen.....or.........It's important on this forum but not in JWland" If you are thinking this then you may as well head off back to your lovely kingdom hall and wait for Armageddon........for it may well come YOUR way.
There are women and men here who are still gathering the courage to come forward, so please don't undermine them.