How do you get over all the things that you missed? The stuff you can't get back

by JW_Rogue 39 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Bungi Bill
    Bungi Bill

    In answer to the OP's question, I found it necessary to rediscover the person that I had been before the Watchtower madness took hold, then move on from there.

    It helped to reconnect with friends I had had before this happened:

    - persons who actually proved to be surprisingly forgiving and understanding, considering that back then they must have thought that I had taken complete leave of my senses!

    Other than that, to quote a favourite saying of my late mother, it is a case of "making the best of a bad job!"

  • Xanthippe

    @confusedandangry it's not too late. I pioneered like you and left at thirty. I was a few weeks off 37 when I had my daughter. Many women are having children at forty now. Go for it!

  • Rainbow_Troll
    My biggest regret is not having children. I thought I'd wait until 'the new system'. Now that I'm almost 38 & 'awake' I think I'm past my child bearing years and it's too late for me. I try not to be angry/bitter about it, but it's hard.

    I don't know about that. My mother had me when she was 40 and my dad died seven years later, which means she practically raised me on her own. I wouldn't say I had the best of childhoods, but mine was still better than most and I did survive into adulthood. You might have less energy, but you'll compensate by having greater life experience. A major flaw of our species is that most of us have kids when we are scarcely out of adolescence ourselves. As a firm anti-natalist, I'm in no way advocating you bring another innocent child into this awful world; but there are plenty of lonely, abandoned orphans who wouldn't mind having an older parent.

  • Bungi Bill
    Bungi Bill


    Ttdtt = Teletype-writing device for the deaf?

    You appear to like acronyms, so how's this for one:


  • hoser

    I'm not sure if I have any regrets or if I missed out on fun. I really didn't have a lot of choices. I was programmed to be a mental slave and sex, drugs and university were taboo.

    Ive only had sex with one woman, but we've had a stable relationship for close to 30 years and raised some well mannered apostate offspring. I did try mj a couple of years ago as well as smoked a pack of cigarettes. The drugs do nothing for me and the smokes were nothing spectacular.

    I've tried the slots, no thrill there. Those machines just end up taking all my money. I quit drinking because I got sick and tired of waking up sick and tired.

    I did go to university. For one day. It was on a school trip in grade 12. I am surprised my jw family let me go. I told myself that if I ever was down on my luck and out of a job I'd go back to school. It hasn't happened yet. I might get a degree someday. I'm not totally ruling it out.

    I work in a very specialized line of work that there is currently no university or college training for. Most apprentices drop out because it is fairly demanding and can be unpleasant at times. I am paid well for what I do.

    If I wasn't a jw as a teenager would my life be better?

  • JW_Rogue
    In answer to the OP's question, I found it necessary to rediscover the person that I had been before the Watchtower madness took hold, then move on from there.

    This is hard for me because I was never anybody else, I was raised on this stuff. Even though at times I didn't really believe it I always let it define me. I know doing my own thing will hurt others. It isn't rational but it will hurt them, they'll feel like I'm betraying them. I know that's not true but it won't matter, they are thoroughly controlled

  • James Brown
    James Brown

    Its hard to get over things. I don't think you ever do completely. But they end up being pushed further and further back in your consciousness.

    Depending how things turn out as you get older they can lie dormant or if all the bad JW influenced decisions haunt you into old age, it can be living hell.

    Life is like a roller coaster you have hills and valleys ups and downs good days and bad days.

    Most of my bad days have something to do with the watchtower society.

    Try to create a new life with enough success that the path wont weigh you down.

  • James Brown
    James Brown

    I meant to type the past wont weigh you down. I don't know how to edit a post once its posted.

  • Giordano

    You have 30 minutes to edit your post click on edit below the post box after edit click on save under the post box.

  • Bungi Bill
    Bungi Bill


    Fair point.

    Although I was very young (Year 12 at high school), I had at least begun to develop into something that wasn't quite an automaton of the Watchtower Society. By that, I mean things like sports, education, travel and cultural activities rather than "sex, drugs and rock'n roll". To be honest, I am not particularly disappointed that I "missed out" on those. (However, the brother who laid claim to bringing me "Into The Truth" certainly liked his booze. He also introduced me to the stuff, and sorry to have to report, I proved to be an able student!)

    At the end of the day, though, all you can do is make the best of what you have - looking ahead through the windscreen rather than behind in the rear-vision mirror (or at least trying to, anyway!)

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