If I've been testy lately, here's why.

by cappytan 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • nicolaou
    now what? You seem like a good guy I wish you would re think about being an atheist

    You seem rather patronising, I wish you would consider becoming an atheist.

  • Oubliette

    Good call Billy.

    I predict #1

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim

    Leaving the Borg can be very hard work.

    That combined with everyday life, situations at work plus trying to fade can seem like a mountain to climb sometimes. Yes, the best way to fade is gradually. If you know the Borg is bologna, I know it is very tough to sit through visits with people and just acknowledge them.

    In time, people will see less and less of you. And then as more and more time passes, people just begin to be not surprised to see you at meetings and Field Service.

    Fading can take years, even decades. Yes, I said decades. Every situation in fading is different. Local gestapo Elder bodies are different. Some can be very rogue, some other gestapo groups can be lazier. Just skip out on meetings, by going to one less meeting bit by bit, but NOT all at once. Fading, I liken it to an ART!!!!

  • Oubliette

    nowwhat? You seem like a good guy I wish you would re think about being an atheist

    “I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.” - Stephen Roberts

  • smiddy

    Since when did Jehovah fix anything ? in the world of politics , religion , or the environment ?

    God is like Santa Clause , it`s just for children .


  • Oubliette

    Smiddy: God is like Santa Clause , it`s just for children.

    God doesn't threaten to kill you if you disobey, you just won't get presents.

  • nicolaou

    Cappy I feel your frustration, I guess most of us do. I'm into my fifteenth year of a mostly successful fade having gotten my kids out while they were still young. My wife was very upset but before too long she was also free, she actually asked about putting up a small Xmas tree this year!

    The issue is with the rest of my JW family. Yes, this ongoing fade/charade means the communication lines are technically open with my siblings and I can still visit my hardcore dub Mum for dinner but it's just not natural.

    They know it, I know it. There's a f***ing great big elephant in the room that everyone laboriously ignores.

    Let me give you a little example. My Dad has never been a JW but is always accommodating. When his JW children or other dubs visit for a meal he'll wait and bow his head for a blessing to be said before starting his meal. However, when I and my family are present none of my JW family, two of whom are elders, the other an MS will offer a prayer.

    My Dad used to wait awkwardly before I finally took him to one side and explained what was now the new 'normal'.

    There are lots of 'little things' like this that will never go away. Conversations artificially change when I enter the room. News stories are not commented on because the usual 'time of the end' spin can't be made in my presence.

    Overall it's about as good as I suppose it could be but no fade is ever truly successful when one side of the family remain in a religious cult. It is never over and always requires effort.

    I love my JW family but because of the forced and frankly insincere nature of our relationships I'm not sure I'd ever recommend the long fade to anyone. Given my time over again I wouldn't do it.

    But we're all different, good luck man.

  • cappytan

    I truly appreciate all the words of support.

    Taking them on some touristy stuff today. Hopefully bullsh!t won't come up.

  • stuckinarut2

    In EXACTLY the same position buddy!

    Ah yep.....stay strong!

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007
    Whar ever you dont dont get drunk....trust me! It makes the evil apostate come out.

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