My head hurts

by Akid48 11 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Akid48

    So i still have to go to meeting etc and my head hurts its just im trying to wake up and the teachings are getting shoved back in my head or with field service im giving people papers i want to rip it in my hands.

    Now its like i need a smoking break i have to just walk out the kingdom hall and get my mind back together.

    just something thats new for me

  • Gorbatchov

    I wish you all the best. I had the same feeling 20 years ago. 25 years old, just read RF Coc. Confusing times.


  • LoisLane looking for Superman
    LoisLane looking for Superman

    It is hard for you because you just woke up to find out a big real estate company masquerading as a charitable Chistian religion has been playing with not only your life but millions of other peoples lives as well. Not nice. Scary infact. The valuable information you have in your head right now, will stop you from making bad decisions in literally giving your life away to this flip flopping, suck the life out of you, real estate empire. It was hard for all of us. We all had to fight the tide against WT brainwashing techniques. We understand where you are coming from.

    That are a lot on the board that would be so thrilled to get a "do over" from age 13 on, me included. WT/ has ruined millions of lives.

    What interests you at this time or what subjects have you got lined up to study in high school? Are you interested in academics? Sports? Music? When you are at the KHall on your tablet, can you post some of those topics to follow instead of BS? The idea is to pick something that will shut out all the conflicting "noise" you hear at the hall.

    I wish none of us had to go to the kingdom hall ever so we could have lived normal, functional, lives.

    Go to school. Do home work. Play. RELAX. Not get dressed up and go sit at the Hall and be told what to do and what not to do and told no questions allowed.

    Personally, I haven't been to the hall since I read CofC by Ray Franz. To go now... and see the big TV screens and everyone using a tablet and nodding their heads along without questioning anything... I just couldn't do that.

    Please know, that we all care for you and are here for you. It is hard what you are doing... But the benefits for you being so young, you will be able to make better, more sound decisions that will affect the rest of your life, are well worth it.

    Hugs to a smart young man.

  • DesirousOfChange

    Go to school. Do home work.

    Yes.........get a good education.

    Oh..............and QUIT SMOKING!

  • Akid48



    @LoisLane looking for Superman

    i thank you for what you have said and with the posting thing i wont post about school etc but i do think about it a lot i think what do i want to do in the future not when will this bad world end.

  • cellomould

    Hey @Akid48

    I have to confess: I still occasionally have dreams that I have to go out in "field service" despite that I don't believe at all what is printed on the literature I am giving to people. They aren't awful dreams, just very annoying. I have been away from the KH and everything else JW for many years. However, I should also mention that it was a young person (just a few years younger than I was, at the time) whom I met in field service that helped open my mind to the fact that I did not have to believe the JW teachings anymore.

    After that conversation, I wrote down the young person's address and intended to return after doing a little research, so I could preach to them again. However, I was not to return. My research began with some bible reading, and somehow I read enough, without the assistance of JW literature, that I doubted more and more. Most importantly, I was doubting the literal flood account of Genesis. It took me about a week to decide I had done enough research that I couldn't believe the JW's literal biblical interpretation.

    I read a few really good books and for the first time, read information at websites related to Christian theology. My belief system changed so quickly, when I finally dared to make my own decision as to what I believed.

    I was a young adult when I left the JW faith, so I do recommend great caution in disclosing doubts to any JW believer, whether or not they are an active JW.

    btw: do those @'s actually tag someone, to notify them?


  • Akid48


    thanks for telling me your story and no the @ it will not notify them i think

  • Chook

    Akid48 , you have full control of your mind don't allow the propaganda any room in your awakened mind. Your doing well but you will need to read up un cult control symptoms and tread like a ninja around family. Good luck kiddo.

  • John Free
    John Free

    Your doing well kiddo! Never forget you're playing a long term game. Avoid confrountation. As long as you keep using your critical thinking skills and just try to think about other things to ignor the indoctrination at meetings. Remember one reason meetings are so long and boring and repetitive is so that people become too mentally tired to question what's being said!

  • Akid48


    thanks for the luck

    @john free

    thank you for your words

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