What to do when you're PIMO and dont want to date a jw?

by nowawake14 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • nowawake14
    nowawake14

    What are your thoughts on that?

  • slimboyfat
    slimboyfat

    Date non JW?

  • stillin
    stillin

    I know how it is. It almost seems like the two of you getting together is a foregone conclusion, a marriage made in heaven. You get hints from others suggesting that you might be "compatible."

    This will continue until one of you leaves or one of you makes a different choice. It sounds like both of those things are happening with you.

    The only thing worse than breaking off a lousy relationship is letting it go on.

  • tiki
    tiki

    Go for it and ignore the cult rhetoric. Its your life and you should enjoy it.

  • RubaDub
    RubaDub

    If you're a PIMO guy, just explain to her that if you get a woody that neither one of you will touch it.

    Rub a Dub

  •  The Bethelite
    The Bethelite

    There is always Masturbation

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    Become a private person re dating especially around your JW family who are still in, same for JW friends and Elders. None can be trusted.

    Let's start with what's immediately available....... The JW's who are in your life or in the religion at large. Your PIMO so you need to look for a person who is also PIMO.

    Which type of JW should you consider:

    A person who chronically shows up late for any meeting especially the Memorial and any Assembly. Also known to be absent from same........ more then usual. This would be good news.

    You'll want an appealing looking person and not so modest that it's difficult to think of them as attractive.

    Someone who Never talks about the WT meetings, jw.org, assemblies or JW's in person.

    And Never references anything overly positive about anything in the JW world.

    Make sure during the summer this person has a great tan and it looks like their body is in good shape....... indicating time spent in recreation and exercise........... Not knocking on doors.

    A person who on vacation wouldn't dream of visiting a foreign KH.

    If you hit it off you have the JW base in common especially if ridicule about the JW world is well received.

    To go to your question about dating a a non JW:

    You need to establish a base from which a relationship can grow. It's easy in the JW world because you hold the same beliefs or interests and meet regularly a couple of times a week or at an assembly. You qualify because you are a JW.

    It is helpful to duplicate a close tie and common beliefs when dating a non JW.

    You need to have a base line that permits getting to know one another. A Daily or weekly meeting is helpful.

    A gym, running in a group, taking Karate lessons. The work place, a school classroom etc.

    The best way to meet up is to be a volunteer. Good people volunteer. If you are looking for the right person, if you enjoy the satisfaction of helping those who need help and get to see how a 'person of interest' handles those responsibilities.......your learning curve really takes off.

    You need to enter someone's life organically, the relationship must be given room to grow, common interests will be important. And a common disdain for all things JW will he helpful.

  • peacefulpete
    peacefulpete

    This is why PIMO is such an impossible situation. You have to be true to yourself and stop the dishonesty if you ever want to be happy again. Millions have done that and have made good lives for themselves. PIMO is in some ways accepting the JW lie is true that 'there is nowhere else to go'. There is, and those who come to terms with the experience can have meaningful, fulfilling lives.

    Getting involved with a JW as if that was your only option is just a disastrous proposition, and cruel to the other person.

  • LauraV
    LauraV

    Careful, when they find out your true feelings they might report you to the elders.

  • days of future passed
    days of future passed

    Find a group that has the same hobbies as you or if you don't have a hobby, find one. Meetups or something similar will give you an opportunity to find others that enjoy the same thing as you.

    Not everyone in the world is as evil or bad as JW land teaches. But you do have to be discerning.

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