Insight into Death ?

by Brummie 28 Replies latest jw experiences

  • MrMoe

    Sorry honey... mom during her sruggle with end stages of advanced COP and lung disease, due to the HIGH doses of meds would lose touch with reality.

    I can't say there is life after death. I don't know. In essence, nobody does. What I can tell u is what matters to you and what you feel. Mom was always in the hospital, and the last time the doctor said she would recover. I told all my friends she would die there. I almost wanted her to. For years she could barely walk without almost dropping dead from lack of oxygen... 9 years of walking around with an oxygen tank... My friends, they said how sick and morbid... at the time I was heavy into tarot... not sure if it was my own sanity on the line, but I went though some far out stuff. Could have been something more, could have been my poor mental state. Who knows. I won't bore you with all the wierd things... But, I will share this with you.

    I wasn't with mom when she died. I was at work. Suddenly I started crying about mom and 30 minutes later dad called. She passed away about the time I broke down in tears. I went to the hospital. The nurse said cause of my tats she didn't think I was a JW, so she told me mom's last words. She said she talked to God. She told him she was ready. She told God she was afraid of leaving Dad and Me behind. Thes she smiled, they gave her a dose of morphine and Dad held her hand while she died.

    Dad said that night that when mom woke up to the paradise earth, mom promised to meet him in a field of wild flowers and they would hold hands and run barefoot like the days of thier youth.

    Later on while under stress (maybe a few days later,) I decided to clean (I do that when I have to distract myself.) Something went flying out of a stack of paperwork and magazines. It was a piece of JW literature... and there it was. A picture of a little boy and a little girl... running through a field of wild flowers.

    Was it the stress I was under? Was I looking for something to relate to? Likely. Does that matter? No. What matters is what is important to ME. What matters is what I beleive. Not the guy down the street or the people on this forum. If belief in life after death makes you feel comfort, then so be it. The heart knows what is best.

  • fairy

    Ravyn said in a post "called us on the phone after we moved away to 'ask' us if it was ok to go."

    when my dear mother was in hospital she knew she was going to die soon and was saying things about going to heaven even though she had been a witness for many many yrs...the nurse told one of my sisters that people who are about to die often ask if it is ok for them to go....

  • Sentinel

    MrMoe, How odd for you to mention the thing about your dad saying your mom would wake in the Paradise and they would run hand and hand through a field of wild flowers.

    That's EXACTLY how my mother told me "reuniting with dad would be" for her. Dad passed in January of '01. They promised each other whoever went first would wait in a field of flowers for the other. She had very vivid dreams in the early stages of her grief, that she was going soon to be with him. He was standing in the field of flowers, calling out to her, with outstretched arms,...and she was trying, like in slow motion, to reach him. Gradually her dream faded a bit and the reality of managing without him keeps her grounded in living a bit longer.

    Sometimes, people do die of broken hearts. I always feel so much empathy for companions that have been together many, many years. They are so bonded and forged together. Then, death comes, and snatches one away from the other. That's got to be a major adjustment.

    This is a good thread, isn't it?

  • aunthill


    What you are going through is so hard. I think it depends on the person and how in tune they are with the spiritual whether they are aware or not.

    My Dad had two heart attacks and was hospitalized in the town where he lived. He always said that if he had to go to the hospital in the "city" he would die. Well, he had to go to the "city" for the bypass surgery he needed and sure enough, he died. But, the day he had the surgery was my daughter's birthday, so, trying to be encouraging (even though I had a premonition that he was going to die) I told him he couldn't die on her birthday. The surgery was a success, but he never woke up, and he lived for two more days. On the evening before he died, I told him it was OK for him to go and he died about 4 the next morning. He knew years before what the circumstances around his death would be, and, he didn't say, but I know he knew he was not coming out of that hospital.

    My mother was a different story. She had a heart attack and was in the hospital for a month. Her kidneys and liver were failing, and her lungs were in bad shape because of smoking so many years. Because of these things, they couldn't operate because they feared the operation would kill her. So the doctor sent her home to die. The morning of the day she died, she asked the hospice nurse "When am I going to get out of this bed!" So she had no clue.

    Even though it has been years since my parents died, my friend has just gone through it with her mother, and it brings it all back. Know that we are all thinking of you right now.

  • MrMoe
    This is a good thread, isn't it?

    Yes, it is. Sad things can become very positive when looked at from a different angle.

  • Brummie

    Thanks mrmoe, aunthill, fairy and sentinel, I appreciate your feedback, it takes a lot of strength to be able to talk and bring these thoughts back to the surface (((( )))) its all been helpful.


  • gold_morning

    The night before my Jw father died I went to see him. I had been disfellowshiped for years. You know how JW's next to never really talk about Jesus. It was always Jehovah. Not that anything is wrong with that..... but we just never discussed Jesus in regards to our salvation. We gave Him no diety.

    That night I was siting in the chair while he was sleeping. He woke up and seemed glad to see me. He started talking and he went on and on about Jesus. I thought that so strange coming from someone who was a JW his whole life. It wasn't that he even had a Catholic background or something.

    I always felt that Jesus came to him and took him home. I think he finally understood the whole thing at the very end.

    agape love, gold

  • cruzanheart

    Dear Brummie, I am so sorry about your father. My prayers and hugs are with you and your family. I do think people, if they are willing to look at it, know when they are going to die. As for what comes after, I don't know. I don't think we're meant to know everything, and I'm not ready to find out about the afterlife up close and personal just yet. I think there has to be a reason why we think about it so much, and why we try to hard to stay alive. I don't notice my bassets obsessing about the subject (but then bassets don't obsess about much unless it's food-related).

    Anyway, my friend, please share your feelings with us and let us help you through it!

    Lots of love,


  • Carmel

    "Death is a messenger of joy!"

    Brummie, you may want to check out the two books called "Life After Life" and its sequel. They are annecdotal stories about people that have experianced medical/legal "death" and have revived or "come back". Many dismiss them wanting not to accept the inference that we are spiritual beings having a material experiance. Wether Dubbies or materialists (mostly atheists) the idea that our conciousness survives our physical bodies, flys in the face of their closely held doctrins.

    One of my older brothers actually died twice on the operating table. He used to tell about it but the elders counciled him not to as it was "stumbling" others. What a crock!!


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