Hows come I wanna just sit on my ass today and do nothin?

by gumby 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • freeman

    I’m here to support you Gumby, ya poor lazy bastard!

    My story: I’m at work, the computers are running fine so I don’t have to do anything work wise, my boss is not in today and I’m all alone so I have all the time in the world to do anything I want.

    However, I have a very intimidating 900-page psychology book sitting in front of me busting my balls. What I should be doing is working on a very hard paper due this Friday in which I am supposed to contrast Spearman’s model of intelligence and Gardners’s multiple intelligences (oh the joy).

    Wait it gets better; it has to be in a format acceptable to the American Psychological Association even though it will never be published by the APA or anyone else for that matter. Soooo just what am I doing as the deadline approaches?

    I am reading all the posts at JWD (and responding to yours) when I should be up off my lazy ass writing a paper comparing the thoughts of dead psychologists to each other (God knows the fate of humanity and the continuance of life as we know it depends upon this).

    And what will happen should I get off my lazy ass and complete this task? Well I believe that then the aforementioned *&^%**! paper will make it’s way to someone that will grade it, point out the numerous errors I have made (making sure that I understand this assignment was in fact child’s play to someone of his intellect and stature) thus having the net effect lowering my grade average. Said &*%^#$! worthless paper will then be placed in a metallic cylindrical device awaiting final transport to a landfill. And no I’m not going to recycle, if I’m getting a shitty grade it’s going in the regular garbage!

    So there you go Gumby, you’re not the only lazy bastard around here. We poor lazy bastards must all stick together.

    Freeman (poor lazy bastard class)

  • Satanus

    If there was nothing wrong w your original scheduling for the weekend, why change it? (That's a good one.) Armageddon isn't coming anymore.

  • Satanus

    This sudden day off is just too sudden Tell her that w big projects, men have a need for knowing in advance.

  • Valis

    gumby...tell her that nothing done hastily is done right...I'm with SS on this one...and if you're going to be doing stuff on the floor, go fetch her and tell her you both need to get down there for a closer examination...with no clothes on of course..


    District Overbeer of the "God Bless Carpet Burn" class


    Gumby, what to do?


    Spannerintheworks: you damn near killed me with your comments .

    It's like my insane cousin, she wants her husband to help her do yardwork, (July 2000) there's a tornado warning...and what do they decide to do? Go outside to do some yard work, and lo and behold the F2 is bearing down on them. doh! Silly woman, her husband stayed indoors, being the lazy bastard he was (for that evening).

    He just remembered them running through the door real fast, screaming for him to get to the basement. Then the TV went off...power went out...and well...isn't he glad he stayed indoors?

    The yard work: worse. There were cars overturned, swimming pools in places they shouldn't be, and lawnmowers in trees. So much for cleaning up eh? They ended up doing twice as much.

    Be a lazy bastard, it's OK, we can relate - having been one now and again.


  • gumby

    Well I'm back after a few hours of guess what? Ripping up the wood floor in the dining to get to the old wood floor! Damn women anyhow.

    Freeman, I'm glad your in the lazy bastard club

    SS, You scare me with how many good ideas you can come up with for getting out of work......but I like it!


    By the time she gets home, I'll be too tired to do the nasty.( but a little nip or two could change all that )

    Well , damn I'm proud of myself. I did some stuff and going to do a little about half an hour.


  • onacruse
    Well , damn I'm proud of myself. I did some stuff

    LOLOL...yeah, ripped up the floor. Ma is gonna come home and say, "Oh Honey, I'm soooooo glad you decided to finally start on that project; I've been asking you to do that for the last 20 years. So when is it gonna be done? Eh? Eh? Eh?"

    LOL, you poor sucker.


  • Satanus


    I'm self employed. I need to give customers reasons for not doing, as well as for doing things, sometimes. Also to make them happy w their decisions. 'Course, i always look out for their interests.


  • onacruse
    'Course, i always look out for their interests.

    That UK humour...LOL....Palm Springs high summer is wet compared to your dry.

    Speaking of summer: gumby, that's a good reason to wait on re-finishing the floors...tell her that floor finishes set-up best when the temp is over 110F...hehe


  • Farkel

    Get off it and fix the damn floor. You'll feel better about yourself and your wife will feel better about you.


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