Women raised as JWs: Did the WTS views on women negatively impact you?

by berylblue 17 Replies latest watchtower scandals

  • berylblue

    I'd really like to know.

    My experience was that women who were raised in the "truth" and married to a good JW brother did not know how to make decisions. From reading this board, this would, however, appear to be the least of their problems.

    What specifically, if any, were the problems associated with always being told you were a second class person and not capable of making decisions?


  • ashitaka

    Well, having that type of attitude prevail made me a better husband, because when I was growing up as a JW, my mother always fought that type of garbage, and in the end, the JW-think had an opposite effect on me;

    it made me see what NOT to do in a marriage. And you know what? NOT being a JW husband is all benefits.

    Thank you WTBTS, for opening my eyes!


  • Xena

    Almost crippling low self-esteem....depression....inablity to make my own decision...another legacy from the WT...that I am slowly but surely shaking off. You really have to pity the women you left behind ......

  • cruzanheart

    I was never very good at the knuckle-under-to-penis-people idea. My mom, who had a very abusive upbringing by her father and brothers, respected no man, including my father, but she was also superstitiously scared of authority, so she was this weird mix of "yes we must obey" and "go to hell, scum-sucking men." Somehow I THINK I grew up fairly normal, probably because I wanted to, but you'll have to check with Big Tex on that. Anyway, the only negative impact on me was that I did NOT want to marry one of those guys who thought women had to be in subjugation, not subjection. Correspondingly, they weren't the least bit interested in me. One guy said about me: "I don't think I can handle her," which pleased me enormously ("Wild Thing" playing in the background). And finally I ran into a guy who appreciated my mind and my spirit, as well as my booty, and we are living happily ever after!

    NOT The End!


  • SpiceItUp

    The way women are treated was one of the main reasons I cuold never become one (well that along with their blatant hypocrasy).

    I posted in a related thread about this as well


    Its sad because I still see my mom treated unfairly by my father.

  • goofy

    I attracted to the bossy ego maniacs. I know this is horrible. If a guy treats me nice I just don't have sexual feelings for him. I am working on this mentally though because I know it is stupid on my part. I am always most comfortable with a man who takes care of me so to speak and takes the lead. But most of these men aren't great catches because when it comes down to it they don't respect women. I think this mentallity comes from my raising as a JW. Always looking up to the men, the Elders to take care of problems and our family has some males with very strong JW male mentality which I grew up with. It is sad that I cannot respect a nice flexilbe mentality in a man, somehow it seems weak to me but I know it is actually the strong man who can be that way. My mind knows but my feelings and attractions have a hard time following. Anybody else have this dilema?

  • rebel

    I always hated the WTS views on women. I was a mouthy so-and-so when I became a JW and always found the whole submission thing very difficult. Being a JW really wore me down and made me quite ill, I think. I hated having to obey the eejits we had as elders in my congregation. Some of these guys were real morons, they would do everything back to front and we just had to go along with it. What really annoyed me was they way other sisters would go all stupid and fawning over elders and MSs. Yuk!

    And weren't husbands supposed to treat their wives the way Christ treated his apostles? I wish someone would have told my husband that!


  • caligirl

    It certainly didn't sit well with me, but I tried for a long time to force myself into the submissive role. Didn't work and I became very depressed. I know that my brother had a big problem with women not being allowed to hold positions in the congregation as well.

  • bittersweet

    Actually, the WBTS views on women had a positive effect on me, because I learned how wrong they were. I grew up seeing my mother being forced to submit to a tyrannical man (my former step-father), being told time and again by the elders that she wasn't being a submissive enough wife.

    My husband of 15 years is still a witness, but he has never tried to hold the headship thing over me.He's knows it wouldn't get him too far (except out the door).I certainly don't need a man to tell me what to do or how to live,which is why I left the whole organization in the first place!

  • Scarlet

    All of the women in my family are very submissive and that never sat well with me. I was always very vocal on my feelings and said I believe men translated that part of the bible wrong. I even mad sure obey was taken out of my vows I told the brother giving our talk that I would not say that. He asked my husband if that was ok and he said that was fine she is not for me to control.

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