Sorry for being so self indulgent...I've been meaning to post this but had reached my limit, so I put it in another thread.
This still upsets me. I don't know why it should...perhaps because I am, as my ex-husband stated, self-absorbed and childish.
But as part of my therapy, I present to you....
I don't drive and never have. As an incentive to get over my fear, my twin sister gave me an old red VW Beetle. It was sitting in my parking lot for a few weeks while I tried to summon up the courage to learn to drive.
An elder told me that there was a really needy family in the congregation and that if I gave them the car, it would really help. The mother needed it to go to her part-time job. I didn't think about it, I just said, "sure, no problem", and proceeded to give the husband of the family the title, etc. My sister was really mad but calmed down when I assured her that this family was really in need.
So, after a few weeks, I get invited to a party at this family's house. (Oh, by the way, while I did get a verbal thank you, I never got a note. Now, I was a little bothered by this, I think that if someone gives you a car, albeit an old one, you should sent a written thank you. But that was over with in a few minutes. Not everyone writes thank you notes all the time the way I do.)
I was stunned by what I saw when I walked into this family's house.
THIS FAMILY WAS BY NO MEANS POOR. NOT IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM. The house was huge and in a beautiful neighborhood.
(Please keep in mind that I lived in a tiny apartment and barely made ends meet. Not that that was a problem, because I don't really need much; I would like to have nice things but if I don't, that's okay. I'd trash pick - a fine South Jersey tradition - and then spray paint everything I find with black lacquer and it always looked good. The point I am trying to make is that I didn't have much and these people did.)
The house was stunning. Not my taste, but very elegantly appointed. The furniture was obviously expensive, and to top it all off, they had one of those huge screen TVs. And large portraits of the entire famiy. Crystal and Mikasa everywhere. Big yard.
Still, I wasn't too bothered. A little puzzled, but I trusted the elder. Just because one has an expensive looking house doesn' t mean one has money on hand to buy a car.
Well, in the ladies' room at the KH one Sunday, I asked the sister if the car was running all right. She said, "We sold it to Sister X's brother".
I was flabbergasted. "YOU WHAT?"
"Well, we didn't need it, so we sold it."
"TO SISTER X's BROTHER???? HE JUST GOT OUT OF JAIL AND HE IS TRYING TO START OVER AND YOU SOLD IT TO HIM?????????"
"Why are you getting so upset?"
"You sold the car to a man who needed a break. You sold something that was given free to you. I can't believe this."
"He's not a Witness anyway. He's a Muslim."
"What does that have to do with anything? "
Now I'm really pissed. I could have given the car to the Muslim man had I known he needed it. The poor man just got out of prison and wants to go clean, and a Witness sells a car she got for free to this poor man. Was I wrong to be upset? Apparently so.
The discussion went on and I finally got so upset that I left the ladies room in anger.
The PO was right there, waiting.
"What is the matter with you? You can be heard in the Main Hall. "
I told him what had happened. I can't remember what he said to me. But it was bad enough that I ran out of the hall, crying. He did not see where I would be so upset.
"You don't handle criticism well, do you?"
"Why should I be criticized? What did I do wrong?" (Well, besides disrupting the meeting.)
I can't remember what he said. I blocked it out almost immediately, which I tend to do when I get upset.
Of course, that didn't stop me from going to the hall, good little Witness that I was.
Am I wrong to still feel hurt?
(Sidenote: The sister who sold the car did not get reprimanded for arguing in the KH. Only I did.)
Oh, yeah. I provided, guided by what I thought was Jehovah's direction. Maybe it was.... maybe this family absolutely needed another 5 foot TV screen....