Need Advice please help.

by QCA1 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Robdar

    Every woman I know who had a DS baby had them when they were in their 20's. I know that the belief is that older women give birth to DS babies, but I have never seen it happen.

    "About 80% of babies with Down Syndrome are born to mothers under the age of 35. About 1 in 400 babies born to women over 35 have Down Syndrome"


  • SheilaM

    Many more women are now prepared to take the plunge after 35. Risk of a baby having Down's syndrome is one in 100 if the mother is 40, compared with just one in 2,000 at the age of 20.

    Robdar: Not sure where you got that statistic this is the one I found. My Mother in law was in her 40's. Maybe more older women are terminating pregnancy but this is the stat's I found. I also found graphs that show the same statistical information.

    6 . What are a couple's chances of having a child with Down's Syndrome?

    In the usual circumstance, the chances depend upon the age of the mother. Many studies were conducted on this and the odds of having a child with Down's Syndrome at age 35 are approximately 1 in 350. Under age 25, the odds are about 1 in 1400 and at age 40 the odds are about 1 in 100.

    The chances of a parent of a child with Trisomy 21 having another child with Down's Syndrome is approximately 1 in 100. If the child has a translocation, the recurrence risk can be as high as 100% or as low as 2%. Parents of children with translocation type of Down's Syndrome should have chromosome analysis to detect a carrier state. (Pueschel, 1990)

  • Mulan
    I have just had news that my JW daughter-in-law has been told that her baby, she is expecting in July, has a 1 in 400 chance of being Downs Syndrome, 3yrs ago her brothers wife also had a Downs Syndrome baby.

    DON'T WORRY!! Princess had that same test (Maternal Serum Alphafeta Protein) when she had her daughter, and was told the same thing. A friend of ours, who was 42 also was told this after her test. More likely for her to have a DS baby. Both were normal babies and very bright now. Zoe is almost 5, and extremely normal little girl. The other one is 2 and a half, and driving them crazy.............very normal.

    The test is routine, and I don't think they should tell people that likelihood of Down's because it is so remote a possibility.

  • cruzanheart

    I add the "don't worry" phrase to everyone else's -- I had my first child at 37 and my second at 40, and each time the doctor was obligated to tell me the odds of having a Down's Syndrome child. The odds were pretty close when I was 40, but both of my children are perfectly healthy mentally and physically. DON'T WORRY!!!!

    Lots of love,


  • Joyzabel

    OMG, Cruzanheart, you DO NOT look that old, much less becoming a mom when you claim you did!!! (not that I'm doubting you, gal. You just blew me away) Now how old are your kids? 1 & 3????



  • Princess

    I understand the fear you feel right now. As Mulan mentioned above, I had the same thing happen when I was pregnant with my daughter. When I didn't hear back regarding my AFP blood test, I called the doctor. She called me right back and told me my test was abnormal indicating that I had a very high possiblilty of a Down's baby. I was devastated. I was 28 and had a fourteen month old baby boy already. She suggested an amniocentesis and I was anxious to have it done. I had so many people telling me I shouldn't have the amnio because it was so risky but I did the research and found it was actually very low risk. Steve and I felt it was important to find out before the baby was born if there was a problem. I would not have considered abortion. I really wanted to be happy about the birth of my child and knew that if I had time to adjust to having a Down's baby I could be happier at her birth. We also thought it would be good to know ahead of time so we could be informed and line up whatever help and resources that we available by the time she was born.

    Many women test abnormally when they have the AFP. There are many factors that can cause a false test. It's been several years but I read a lot about it and figured my being on birth control pills so close to becoming pregnant could have caused it.

    After the amnio, we waited on pins and needles for what seemed like forever. I think it was two weeks. I got the phone call that I had a healthy, normal baby girl and nothing to worry about.

    I hope this works out to be nothing for your family too. A 1:400 chance is really so minute, but I do totally understand how devastating and scary this is until you know for sure. It is the uncertainty that is so hard to bear.

    Feel free to email me if you have any questions or just want to talk about it.


  • QCA1

    Again thankyou all for your comments i appreciate them so much, it is going to be hard just waiting for the next scan.

    I am sure she said she didn't want the amnio as the risk of misscarriage was there.

    Because you have given me some good advice i feel able to deal with this in a more positive way and feel able to help my DIL better than i first thought possible.

    My dear friend Robdar, thankyou for the crocuses they look beautiful.


  • blondie
    Blondie: First that is the worst advice I've ever heard given to anyone no killing a Down's Baby should never be an option.

    SheilaM, I hope it was clear that I was not giving this advice. But I have had health care people make this suggestion to a friend of mine. It is never an option for me or to suggest to anyone. I was merely trying to say that some in this situation might bring it up and to be firm with them that this will never be a choice. I'm sorry if I didn't make myself clear. I hope I have here.

    I am deeply sorry for any pain this misunderstanding might have caused.


  • SheilaM


    Thank you for clarifying the information that you gave. I just know that Benny has been such a joy and everyone was so "horrified" when they found he was Down's.

    I just get so irritated that Doctors are causing the needless death of children by this test. I know Melanie at 19 was scared to death and one of the girls I worked with went through three months of hell worrying about the test and the false results of it. I guess the worst story was when a sister in our old hall had an affair and her child was Down's everyone acted as if it was HJah's retribution to her affair. Pissed me off I tell you.

    Thunder and I have thought about being Foster parents for a Downsey (which is what we called Benny).

    With my little niece I think it would be easier if she had been Down's I didn't realize my Sister in law would be so stupid to drink while pregnant Sarah just looks "wrong" and you can't put your finger on why you know. She looks alot like me when I was little but yet not, she breaks her arms really easy and her ears are low set (mine aren't) and she has muscular problems with her eyes and has about 3 or four operations. Now she is very intelligent but she has all the signs of fetal alchol syndrome and it just makes me want to strangle her Mother and my Brother for letting it ever happen.


  • SheilaM

    Cruzenheart: Thanks for your reply I have been tossing around having another child or two and your story got me thinking again aobut it. We kept our Grandbaby for the first time overnight she slept with us and was a DOLLL. SO thanks so much hmmmm baby another lil Thunder

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