Fading with Confidence
Really, really good post.
I was fading but I am so sick of being bothered by elders and elderettes, being watched on Facebook (I have protected my personal page but have a public page for my business and one of the elderettes couldn't help but make a comment about something and I though 'oh, so now you are looking at my page' They also were following me on Instagram until I blocked them.) that I feel I should abandon the fade and go for a clean break.
Things that hold me back: 1) When they announce you no one will know you have DA. They'll all think you were DF for something. 2) It's giving them authority over me as Della Street said above. 3) I live in very small town could I cope with the shunning? 4) My uber brother and sister would be so happy to hear I am out
But as long as you are technically a JW they are always going to be watching and waiting.
Hello everyone and thanks for your responses -
Phoebe - it was your situation that caused me to raise this issue again.
I posted the topic just hours before I left on international travel, because I didn't want to lose the draft. I will further our discussion (based on your comments)
The travel I mentioned involved flight delays, missed connections and 2 FULL days and nights at big airports. I need to recover and collect my scattered wits before I respond to your...zzzzzzzzzzzzz
" But as long as you are technically a JW they are always going to be watching and waiting."
That is obviously correct of a "fade", but I think as time passes the safer you get, of course you could fall foul of an enthusiastic Fascist Elder who wanted to pursue you, but that is unlikely.
I have told a couple of Elders they cannot now DA/DF me for Apostasy, as I was never part of the religion that developed in the last few years, I never was offered the Overlapping Generation Doctrine etc etc, so could not reject them. I don't know if that reasoning has any effect on them, but they just talk about "since you have left...." so they must recognize I am technically D.A but are not doing anything official about it.
I prefer to be simply "inactive/non-attending" in their view, and try not to do anything to awaken the beast. Maybe this will work for you and others.