For My Kids (page 3)

smiddy

You are quite right in saying you have an equal right in saying how your children are brought up .Forget this bullshit about Man being the head of the house to make all important decisions..... Hogwash.

That rubbish has been nourished throughout history by the Hebrew Scriptures , the Christian Greek Scriptures , and the Quran /Koran to name a few with the full intent of keeping women in their place , downtrodden

I am a male ,father and husband to two boys.Sadly we were JW`s for 37 years and I regret bringing my boys up in this religion as head of the house.( Even though we are all out now ) Some damage you can never undo.

Don`t make that mistake.

Stick by your guns and don`t let yourself be intimidated by anyone.Your children`s future depends on it.

Your second response here seems a very well conceived plan to implement , there has to be compromise on both your parts .

You must have a voice in how your children are to be educated , in a secular sense and religiously .

I wish you well and take care

smiddy

Black Sheep

I'm an unbaptized born in. My position isn't quite the same as yours. I introduced my wife to the cult, then never got baptised myself.

You have to be very careful not to portray yourself to your children as the enemy. They are already well indoctrinated, so announcing yourself to be the Watchtower's predicted agent of Satan will not get you a result that you want. Your best chance of rescuing your children, is while they think you are trustworthy. Don't spoil that chance.

problemaddict 2

Ugh. This is hard to even read. Is it possible to have a discussion about specifics? It probably can't hurt at this point.

Honestly, you are probably right to be gearing up for a fight. I would hope for the best and try to be loving, but be planning in the background. Not letting the kiddies get baptized as minors is key. Making sure you influence them and they understand and know your love in unconditional is important even moreso now.

You certainly are not alone. When it isn't so tense, see if your hubs will talk to you about specifics. Everyone has a brick that falls first. Its just rarely what you think it is or should be.

Zana

Not letting the kiddies get baptized as minors is key.

Exactly. So what does he say to that? What did he answer to your marriage-comparison? Will he agree to wait with the baptism decision until the children are adults?

myjourney

@Zana

It didn't seem to make much of an impact. Instead, he tried to convince me that he got baptized at 12 because he wanted to serve jehovah and it had nothing to do with his family or wanting to please his family. As far as agreeing to have our kids wait, that's still up for debate.I will fight him, my family, his family, and anyone else to ensure this doesn't happen.

LisaRose

That's too bad. Never give up advocating for your children, this is too important. Think of it as a war, not a battle.

myjourney

UPDATE:

It's been over a year since I initially started this post. I haven't posted, but I've periodically been on here still reading.

My husband and I are still together. To say life is peachy would be a lie, but more and more I'm getting my voice.

My husband and I just don't talk about the "it" in our life. Wherever we do, it's the same conversation, same song, repeat, same song, repeat, etc.

As a mom, I've tried to slowly introduce "worldly" things to my kids, like buying them birthday presents and putting a small Christmas tree up in an inconspicuous area of our home, etc. My middle child is VERY hesitant. She's my tender hearted one and doesn't want to disappoint anyone, especially her dad. It broke my heart, she asked me if for the family, I'd consider just attending meetings together. I later asked my husband if he put her up to it, he said he told her to do what she felt Jehovah would want her to do.

Looking back, I wish I pushed harder for balance before my kids were in school and just learning. I wish I exposed them to Christmas, birthdays, non-JW friends, Trick or Treating, and more right from the start. I want them to see both sides and not feel the guilt because this would be their normal life. Hindsight, 20/20!

Taking it one day at a time for my kids.

bsmart

Thanks for the update, can you tell the kids about when you were young and why things didn't make sense. Changes (new light) etc.; and ask what they are thinking. Keep encouraging education!

Keep us in the loop.

Crazyguy

Doing things like Christmas is not going to help until you show them from the Bible that's is a conscience matter, romans chapter 14 and Colossians chapter 2

For My Kids

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