by Golden Girl 43 Replies latest social family
If you went to someones house as a guest and they asked you to take your shoes off..would you?..Would you be offended?...
Does anyone know if this is proper etiquette?
Didn't know where else to post this.......
My daughter was invited to a neighbors house and they requested people remove their shoes!...She never had anyone ask her that before.
I can understand why..but is it proper and acceptable now? Just wondering what others thought.....
Snoozy.......
Hi Snoozy,
I live in a new home with white carpet. All my neighobrs went with white carpet. Everyone askes everyone to remove their shoes. If someone wants to leave their shoes on, they soon will see they are the only ones with shoes on.
Ann Landers addressed this...she said if you are invited to someone's home and they ask you to remove your shoes, you should. I am sure Miss Manners would disapprove, however, I am with Ann.
My mother-in-law visits and always takes her shoes off. She likes wearing slippers and that works fine. Just don't walk on my white carpet with dirty shoes....please!
BTW, my clients are realtors...they ask people looking for a home to remove their shoes when going through someone's home. They don't want to be responsible for dirty shoes on a nice carpet.
GoldenGirl, I have known people who have new carpets ask people to take their shoes off, I personally wouldnt ask anyone to do it but I have been asked to before, I did and wasnt offended. However I knew of someone who hit the roof when asked, so they found it offensive! Depends on the nature of the person.
It depends on the custom of the people, some religious people take their shoes off (Sikhs?) as they feel they are standing on sacred ground when entering a persons house (or something like that), its an act of respect.
Q..did you post an empathy prayer on this forum once? I have been searching for it but cant find it. If it was you and you have it available could you send it me in my inbox please.
Hope all is well.
Brummie
GoldenGirl:
I hate shoes in my house YUCK I fight a never ending battle with my hubby on this. If you think about what people walk in YIKES anyways <petpeeve can you tell LOL> When people come over they usually see our shoes by the door and take theirs off. I just try to grin and bear it if we don't know the people well otherwise I say "you can leave your shoes by the door if you like" > I would NEVER be offended if someone asked me to in fact I usually ask if I am going into someones home.
I think it's insulting to request people to remove their shoes before entering their holy ground. When those that had bookstudy homes did it, I did make an issue of it once. (Many JW's feet smell) Yes, I can understand new carpets and muddied shoes. I believe that there are times when I would want to take my shoes off so as to not dirty the place needlessly. But I think it's rude to require people to remove their shoes before entering a simple home. I do not visit such places.
Golden Girl,
It is getting pretty common to be asked to remove your shoes now. Some of my friends have babies/toddlers and they are always crawling on the floor. Imagine what your shoes bring in and what these little ones are crawling in. I have never been offended by this when asked. I never ask people to remove their shoes when they come to my house though - I just remind them to wipe their feet on their way out!
xxR
In Japan, it is not only polite but de rigeur to remove one's shoes upon entering someone else's home; and not only that but also to remove one's shoes when entering a restuarant.
I was in a Japanese tea house in Yokohama once and on my way out, I realized that I'd left my briefcase where I had been sitting on the floor at table. Not thinking, I walked back to where I'd left it but with my shoes still on (I had put them back on inpreparation to leave). Well. You'd have thought I had committed a major fox pass and was going to be shipped out on the next boat. Luckily that didn't happend, but I was humiliated to the nth degree. Never made that mistake again.
I guess it's all cultural. However, If I had spend X dollars putting down a white carpet, I would at the same time have constructed a pigeon hole type box for each guest to place their shoes and would have politely insisted on it use.
So there ya go.
francois
When visiting someone, I always take my shoes off. If the person I'm visiting says "No, it's all right leave your shoes on..." then I do. I expect the same of my guests as well, but I have never had someone just leave their shoes on and walk around my house. (probably because I wouldn't let them get that far )
I think it's just a common courtesy that I was raised with, and I expect most of the people I know in my life are the same...
Dottie
No I wouldnt be offeneded at all, its their house and if they dont like shoes on the carpet its up to them
I ask people to take off their shoes but I provide soft footies and slippers in various sizes for my guests and a nice place to sit to make the transfer. Especially when it is raining or snow is outside. I have never had anybody complain to me to my face or behind my back. At one book study I just brought my own since I my feet got cold in stockings (or they got snagged).
Blondie(have slippers will travel)
